Poems: 040921 - September 4th, 2021

310821A
-----------=20

Scant remains=20
pertaining to anyone=20
hints impossible=20
once it seemed=20
entirely the possible.

The heart=20
isn't in it=20
making it clockwork
hated obsessions=20
with tick tock time.=20

One or the other
species of betrayals
made all too clear=20
far too late=20
to step aside.=20

Get the low down
run down=20
been run over=20
and declared guilty=20
for have a feeling.=20

Anything can=20
and usually does
end at gone
in a heartbeat=20
never coming back.=20

What stuck to you
isn't what you want
but can't get any=20
to come off=20
from what goes on.=20

Been thrown=20
down into it=20
where you can't=20
really get out=20
from being under.=20

Ground level=20
to falling fast=20
past the cut off=20
lines of attrition
then dream on.=20

False circulations=20
fake connections=20
everything consumed=20
everything denied
made lonelier.=20

Ante up social=20
brought no wins=20
and miss the gone=20
left not a hope
for what wasn't.=20

Been that way=20
best of worse
worst of best=20
there is a down
but no real up.=20

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310821B
-----------

Someone's spice box=20
turns out common
chemistry experiments=20
in the grunge=20
back roomer=20
districts long sketch
knowing expired token=20
redemptions of nothing.

Scorched earth
grit screams
neural brakes grip
monkey minds
drag limbs=20
scrape the gone off
from tied shine=20
rust rails.

No one travels=20
this way anymore=20
piled black bags=20
street side luggage
says leaving=20
for some other=20
similar condition=20
of don't know.=20

Places imagined=20
might have been=20
fate's parallel lines=20
long torn down =20
folded up reasons
turned full spreads=20
forever crowd=20
of the not living.=20

Death rattle=20
loose machines=20
misery serenades
lost causes=20
luckless gravel=20
throat stones=20
drop scatter =20
the once rock solid. =20

A rock candy
shatter total=20
break up=20
sticky lick it
sugar drop crack=20
black booted=20
metal stud
and chain gang.=20

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010921A
-----------

It all came=20
the saddest way
space kept=20
as near to sacred=20
as emptiness=20
being defiled=20
with ordinary=20
sorted objections.

Objects arranged
to be broken=20
target hits=20
scored between=20
caved in eyes
kills thought
in an old war=20
of again, again.=20

No one asked
about wishes
reasoned sway
grants of any
actual being=20
permitted vicinity
at any gate
never opens.=20

Fences mended=20
topped countless=20
razor wire cuts
blink eyes swarm
shock watch
the new lands
defining boundaries
and exiles.

Difficult imagine
we once dreamt=20
reading about
to each other=20
before dreaming=20
became silenced=20
no longer listed
permitted subjects.=20

Any cat alley=20
gets the tongue=20
scraps of chorus=20
scarred up=20
freedom cuts
tooth and claw=20
to every saying
gone misunderstood.=20
=20
Cryptic warnings
hit and run=20
scrawled hasty
stray walls
unheeded loner
crash came long
down sky organ
stretched pipes.=20

Plays heaven=20
hidden speakers=20
tell tale secret=20
catchy billboards=20
paste up tuned
enlightenment
trying to tell you
which no way.=20

Wind scalds=20
expanded void=20
littered blank
looking attitudes=20
trading nothings=20
with wired=20
giving thanks=20
for suggestion.=20

Public outbursts
feign conscious=20
chatter blocked=20
corner sits=20
looking pass time=20
not to remember
any moment=20
getting hit.=20

Take the doughnut=20
holes and go=20
doing whatever=20
was intended
with the emptiness=20
won't hold in
anything filling.=20

Trying to avoid
old faces=20
wanting talk
out of any
get away=20
plans and any=20
you could want =20
things happening.=20

Spend what's left
and call it=20
=E2=80=9Ca lifetime=E2=80=9D
gambling small=20
timed out stakes =20
never winning
and never know=20
the right games.=20

Seemed more
than love within
and hate outside=20
boils black burst
mind brim boils
topped soup
burner glow=20
sounds hot lies. =20

That was illusion
this is today=20
being no different
as to parts=20
ending crushed=20
at take away
regions of empty
threatens it all.=20

---------------------=20

030921A
------------

Was looking for a truce=20
a final armistice=20
a negotiated deal=20
but it is never that way
and the war goes on.

My outpost here=20
past every lands end
a failing watch tower
of nothing but solitaire
among the amusements.=20

Did not want to fight you
and wanted to get out=20
from under common lies
leaving ordinary cheats=20
prodding deceptions.

Have no more idea=20
what interests you=20
knowing nothing=20
that interests me=20
ever interests you.=20

Tried a bit of everything
then tried a little more=20
it does not matter
cause you put blame
on any such source.=20

If it was someone else
it might have been=20
seen as something=20
somewhat and interesting=20
somewhat and beautiful.=20

Whatever it is=20
I know you won't=20
ever really enjoy it=20
once you know
it comes from me.=20

Belief is a crock=20
some still fall into
seeking reward points=20
hoping for prizes=20
at secret prize draws.=20

Once had dreams=20
but none of them mine
due to requirements=20
for having someone
from the other side.=20

Nothing comes through
those downed lines=20
the operator =20
a skeleton figure
turns key to no door.=20

It turns numb=20
lost touch=20
worn out feelings=20
that must be kept=20
safe to yourself.=20

The only ones=20
say anything=20
always the same
no need to hear from
being their target.=20

--------------------------- =20

030921B
-----------=20

Gone to those places
seemed calling=20
and on the return=20
counted up the loss.=20

I feel I lost you=20
without a chance
to really know who
and what you are.=20

Completely bored=20
with whatever it was=20
I had conjured up=20
in any of my mirrors.=20

It was not my choice
to exist that way=20
giving the pain of it
as offerings of thanks.=20

An ugly magic
at its very best=20
made into a wall=20
I could never smash.=20

Getting through=20
the somehow category
deemed fit for use
but nothing else.=20

They have shattered
anything I wanted to be=20
into reflecting shards
having no real meaning.=20

Edges of everything=20
always razor sharp=20
so all that it becomes
is the cuts they make.=20

---------------------------=20

030921C
-----------=20

Someone keeps saying
savings account=20
is too small, too small=20
and it is never enough=20
to really add up=20
to ever being saved.=20

You won't be saved=20
they keep threatening=20
debasing cash out values
to what you can get
after made worthless
in today's markets.

You are still too little
to buy your way in=20
to buy your way out=20
but you will never grow
having been stunted
in development.=20

Development office
of technological change
slowly gnaws away=20
everything you had=20
accumulated within you.=20

The formula changed
to something toxic=20
until you choked on it=20
starved to unable
any further continuity=20
with the program.

It all costs money=20
that you never had=20
and every time=20
they always hurt you=20
while you struggled=20
with costs gone up.=20

Change your plans=20
to something different
but you were used up=20
to every last option=20
you ever thought=20
you were able to suffer.=20

Happiness is a dream
that you wait for=20
getting scheduled
to your personal network
so you can all watch=20
what you are missing.=20

--------------------------- =20

030921D
-----------

Nothing to show
and nothing to tell.=20

Keep it in a vault
buried in yourself.=20

Put it all down=20
out of a cruel light.=20

More private reasons
for a secret cry.=20

You won't really hear=20
anything from me.=20

You never listened=20
to anything I said.=20

The dead silence=20
is deafening me.=20

--------------------

030921E
-----------=20

You could fall for someone
stroking your famished ego
being a make believe lover

You could believe that lover
being the one that is different
if that really satisfies you.

You could find that one person=20
who does not really matter
from among everyone else.=20

Believing that is your prize
catch award for effort
though it isn't anything.=20

You will surely hate me=20
for not ever falling=20
for the same old trick.=20

I know it isn't really love=20
and you cannot call it service=20
but only another raw deal.=20

I made something for you
then I gave it to you=20
but you never even looked.

You were anyone=20
and you were no one to me
but I made it very special.=20

Now it isn't anyone special
who is hurting me that much
but it is only the many.=20

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