Poems: 080921 - September 8th, 2021

060921A
----------- 

Where is the good thing
that is going 
and don't know where
it's gone. 

Chasing after 
the invisible tail 
lost in the evolution
of our despot selves. 

Writing our fictions
creating our myths 
about magnificent 
wastes of time. 

Spent at illusions
among the shades  
presented sample 
wallpaper eternities. 

Cover a whole life
with one pattern 
that you can buy into
on an instalment plan. 

An isolated corner
in a waiting room 
and still in denial 
that the world ended. 

It did end 
at failed attempts
to put it together 
into anything again. 

The only people known
are the sorts of people
that we never meet 
among formalities. 

Anyone invited 
would never arrive 
having been diverted
by weather reports. 

Extremes some go to
to convince or force
a dead stop to trying 
at whatever it is. 

All that was wanted 
was bloodied hands
taking your own axe 
to your own imagination. 

What you imagined 
is always turned 
into an instrument
of your self betrayal.

You betrayed yourself
for a few coins
misled into believing 
it was the right thing. 

Walk the shore 
looking how to drown
on the far edge 
seas of agitation. 

Watching the ghosts
holding hands
locked and loaded eyes
along the boardwalk. 

-------------------------

060921B
----------- 

No one you ever wanted
ever wanted anything
that you ever really wanted 
with anyone you wanted. 

You turned to the crowd
but the crowd turned away
someone had bought out
their minds and their time. 

It doesn't really matter 
what we choose to advertise
it will always end up 
dialed a wrong number. 

Those are the worst odds 
anyone ever played 
and it doesn't matter what
it's just a gambling debt. 

It doesn't really matter 
if you never placed a bet
on winners and losers
in a game that's fixed. 

All they ever promised 
was their most cruel love 
their coldest love 
their most broken love.

A love as broken 
as the most broken of us
in the ways they break
everything we love.  

They weren't your lovers 
and they weren't mine 
leaving us in between 
a thought and a feeling. 

---------------------------- 

070921A
------------ 

The sort of complicated
we can never figure out
intended to hold us
in its mental lock.

You cannot get out 
by giving up 
and there is no other way
as it cuts you down. 

Still hallucinating 
outbursts of life 
from a bag of death 
bottom of their river. 

It was a long drift 
to a long way down
breaking that surface
wrong way around. 

It all closes over 
it all closes up 
until nothing reflects 
your there and then. 

No one remembers 
and no one cares
because all there was
was someone else. 

Something about
lessons in wealth
where it always costs more
and you always get less.

It never gets better 
but could get much worse
paying the bills 
for your loneliness. 


------------------------  

070921B
----------- 

If the usual pain 
is not enough
you can be terrorized 
with family plots
for burials
of your memories.  

You are always dying
to something 
something old 
something new 
until dying is a habit
comes before life. 

One grieving 
leads to another 
forming processionals
of the usual events 
and cheery people  
waving at the parade. 

It was a mistake 
counting on anything 
that didn't kill something
cherished inside you 
that you desperately wanted
to keep alive. 

Dying to the people
you used to know 
dying to the things
you used to have 
made dead to anything
you wanted to do. 

There is dying out 
there is dying down 
there is dying away 
but you know 
the dead don't come to life
at the end of their day. 

--------------------------- 

080921A
----------- 

They punch your ticket
to losing 
because that is all the fare
you ever really had
and it won't take you 
one tiny fraction further 
along the same old line. 

Liking doesn't 
mean a damn thing 
then or now 
to anyone anymore
if they don't like you
doing that belly crawl
in their mud holes. 

Can't stand the games 
they made you play
for handfuls of coin 
so you find yourself 
becoming a soul search 
for a game penalty 
or a lifetime suspension. 

Got to get away 
but don't know how 
once you are painted 
that colour 
into a tight corner 
surrounded by yellow lines
and gunmetal objections. 

Went shopping 
in those catalogues 
for a ghost of a future
forever get lost 
ever never find
where to go 
from where you came. 

They didn't like you 
looking like you did
wanting for anything 
you could ever want 
on any long stretch 
welcome to vague
personal freedoms. 

It was a waste of time 
if you believed
amounting to anything
past more of the same
wastes of time spent
filling in the holes 
you can never fill. 

You never made it 
to be anyone's hero 
reinvented and redefined 
strict accordance 
current vernacular
pop up version usual 
brainwash stations. 

Nervous flutter 
of butterfly stomachs
feel the threat levels 
come with emptiness 
so emptied out
we forget to eat 
while they eat us.

Being the bone 
in the mouth of a dog
three heads up
howl at the moon
pleads your case
won't get you in
to another Hell.  

-------------------  

080921B
----------- 

Those friends 
you thought you had 
wrecked you 
knowing the burdens 
of their proof 
were all on their side
keeping them safe. 

You weren't there 
and they are always
any side of anything 
more popular 
than a worn out
old shoe 
that no one wants.

Carry that load 
until you expire 
somewhere past 
always best before 
those warning dates
secret coded 
on the packaging. 

Wrap it up 
with some nowhere 
to send it to 
knowing they left
with those outlaws
always looking 
for some purer pain.  

Strong armed 
and bruised 
is the latest rage 
and they get excited
about going
the other way
at the turn around. 

----------------------- 

080921C
----------- 

I keep writing all
those sorts of things
you never wanted me
ever and to say. 

Convulsive thoughts
from the shake downs
crushes of the head
into the hips. 

It was never a kindness
and what was expected
expected too much
in expectation of nothing. 

Most forms of thought
becoming anachronistic 
and widely unpopular
types of disruptions. 

The campaign 
waged against reason
gathers momentum 
as a tap dancing choral. 

Is there any time 
or are we too late 
for rapid elimination 
of happiness. 

Wipe away your eyes
for having peeked 
when you were told
they must remain closed. 

------------------------------  

080921D
------------ 

Liking your looks
and something about you
I can then short list you
on that list of people
I never expect to meet. 

We are kept so busy 
with absurd projects 
and some are building 
rockets to the Moon
while others count it up. 

I had no idea 
every letter I ever wrote
was a suicide note 
in one translation 
or another. 

It was customary 
to be forced to die 
to something 
end of each paragraph
after a point was made. 

That would keep us 
from unpopular thinking
which could deviate 
from commercial terms
into unthinkable romances. 

There is no proof
about the wealthy 
having any other options 
but we hear rumours 
being deliberately leaked. 

Talk of freedom 
is something cheap 
being mass produced 
made habit forming 
and officially approved. 

We could fantasize 
about anything 
that would never happen
having failed to obtain
any seals of approval. 

It takes time 
for the censors to review
objectionable portions 
of our dreams
returning them for revision. 

We are worn away 
by the process 
that leaves us nothing 
we would have enjoyed 
outside of the too ordinary. 

For the sake of histories
you always write me off
as being too strange 
and I write you off 
as too boringly common. 

----------------------------- 

080921E
----------- 

Removing the moisture 
of any remaining emotion 
you could be ground up
into a fine powder 
that could then be sold 
at an immense price 
for a very small amount
in little plastic bags. 

In that manner 
your worthlessness 
could achieve some worth 
as a magic dust 
similar to many things 
ground up that way
into fine powders
to give them some value. 

Rhinoceros horn
Tiger bone 
eye of Loris 
gall of Bear 
Deer antler
dried millipede
desiccated snake 
rat and hen.  

--------------