Poems: 100622 - June 10th, 2022

250522A
-----------=20

Greyed out=20
phase of daylight=20
starved down hues=20
locked into prisms.=20

Splits up
and divides apart
all the colours=20
were imagined life.=20

Splashes of mud=20
dirty up the rivulets=20
floods of sorrowed=20
countless drops.=20

Tinctures of miseries
promise their good=20
proves not but bitter
and nothing sweet.=20

A passing corpse circus=20
dancing dead dreams
impaled on candy
coloured poles.=20

Far too late for any
and will never be=20
but gas lit=20
and cloying shadows.=20

All feared lost=20
to nothing found
left sole retreat=20
of gone to ground.=20

------------------------=20

250522B
------------=20

Endless little things
needing to be done=20
escape the day=20
chattering disapproving=20
insistence demands=20
to inattentive disregard
all comes from wanting.=20

Looking forward=20
was a fool's game=20
turned to nothing=20
whatever was left
too ugly and mean
to ever think of
scraping from a plate.=20

As if the most broken=20
is ever mended=20
in persistent breaking=20
little bits away
to shove something in
that some believe=20
loved and loving.=20

If you believe=20
in prize catches=20
awaiting the gullible=20
there are fishermen
intent to meet you=20
netted before gutting
out the =E2=80=9Csoul=E2=80=9D.  =20

That makes pliable=20
and stops the relentless=20
thrashing around=20
hurling of selves=20
at absolutely anything=20
seems in reach
but always falls short.=20

Nothing much more=20
than unheard shouts=20
from rooftop forsaken =20
drowned out in vast
pitch sea echoes=20
turned social scream
countless suicides.=20

What caught my eye=20
were broken wings=20
but those only play
near enough to wound =20
and never nearer=20
cloistering victim hopes
under layers of scar tissue.=20

Doesn't matter to anyone
whatever we love
being never available=20
but check market listings
for what might come up
tickling the fancies=20
within your price range.=20

What you need=20
you can never afford=20
and whatever is left
all diminished down=20
to latest pop style
hatred mixed
chronic ugliness.=20

Don't really want=20
existing that way=20
dwelling in that=20
makes wonder
whether dead=20
at some dead end=20
of dead end roads.=20

Amazing loss
but no accounting=20
stained surfaces=20
before getting under=20
whatever passes
as layers of skin =20
along stretches of time.=20

The wrong time
to be vomited into=20
and the wrong sorts
to get to know=20
having been too early=20
for the one=20
too late for another.=20

Gone missing=20
either vague ending=20
an entire spectrum
makes invisible=20
leaving behind=20
unseen trails=20
meant as mementos.

Best forgetting=20
what none remember=20
and particularly nothings=20
all the best people=20
warned about =20
as another sharp turn=20
into doing without.=20

-----------------------=20

260522A
------------=20

We did not say much=20
for multitudes of reasons
always coming up=20
matter and after fact=20
including the meanings
attached to beauty.=20

I would then assume=20
your expectations=20
much higher than mine
followed by my retreat=20
from any forward positions
down to rear echelons.=20

I am only something=20
fell behind you=20
as you advanced your front
lines curving to captured=20
then some other arms
forcing my surrender.=20

Countless little wars=20
ending without fights
in tallied looking=20
looks for signs=20
not from any heaven
but not too impolite.=20

Between the attraction=20
and the knowledge=20
stands invitation=20
guarding any approach=20
between nuanced
dislikes and indifference.=20

Ambiguities of losses=20
mar seasons of forever=20
pretending as if we believe
there is nothing unique=20
and we are all generic=20
bits of Aristotelian ideals.   =20

We can watch spoils=20
from other conflicts
carried on, out and off=20
to various conditions=20
inebriation and display=20
mapped beneath flags.=20

This year flags are pink
particularly revealing=20
along the flanks
and  missionaries
on the hunt to dispense=20
instant conversions.=20

Anything can be believed
but the worst heresy=20
is to believe nothing=20
having once believed
in the ways of love=20
and that too was nothing.=20

-------------------------------

060622A
-----------=20

They never think highly=20
so you pass the point=20
of unknowing and uncaring =20
finding only yourself
knowing no more
than being entertainment=20
they never pay for.=20

Repeatedly assured=20
no one really wants=20
what you really want
but they always want=20
what you won't give=20
in an up, out and around
way of such things.=20

Hard panned hopes=20
once dreamt bountiful=20
harvests never came
from misspent labours
breaking it down=20
to becoming the dirt=20
that it always was.=20

Could roll in it=20
at the limits of filth
but no way to go=20
into anything further=20
doors barred shut=20
as are the minds=20
hiding behind them.=20

Dust cloud laughter=20
from demented drunks=20
with no real idea=20
what they laugh about
in the always on cue=20
standardized mockery=20
disparage of difference.=20

A scraping away=20
everything there is=20
no one can face=20
among repeats at failed
attempts fill holes=20
never really filled
and rub the wrong way.=20

Gets under fingernails=20
now and again swollen
splinters of friendship
become inflamed=20
bursts of shattered trust=20
in misspent emotion=20
festers for a while.=20

Won't be doing=20
whatever it was=20
infected and infested=20
with fevered ambition
twisting and turning=20
saturated delirium
diseased anticipations.=20

If it were fatted=20
could be a calf=20
cut throated and bled =20
out for something
knows nothing about
until empty wrinkle
worn out wine skinned.=20

Thousands of ways=20
devised at cancel out=20
the strayed insistence=20
might be a perchance=20
sort of beautiful vision
but won't be any
and make certain of that.=20

------------------------------

070622A
-----------

Some few endure=20
their own dislikes=20
and some do without
delights of likes=20
in silence vexed=20
cruel abnegations
chanced knows being=20
every sharp terminus=20
past any recourse  =20
jagged timeline blade
carves ever deeper.

Those cuts away=20
pleasers to ghouls=20
caricature masked
stiff of habit=20
inhabit grotesque=20
sideshow theatre
dinner engagements=20
point at freaks=20
in hushed tones=20
exclaiming shock=20
and pretending awe.=20

Historically confined=20
the mind caged=20
in replays of derivatives=20
long past collections=20
dead lines made up
crumbs of cruel
accounts gone public
a best forgotten putz =20
made uglier in contexts
of intrusive future
ruined brainscapes.=20

Makes bitter rue=20
a long ruined journey
replayed departures=20
needs forced seeking
new arrivals to sort
through and aside =20
looks for momentary=20
instant recognition=20
that only strangers know=20
least expected realms
of contrived exceptions.=20

Don't have it=20
and don't know what=20
the matter might be=20
watching it come=20
easily and smoothed=20
to many another=20
without common threads
or discernible reasons=20
but their maker=20
a different puppet master
than pulls your strings.=20

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070622B
-----------=20

Fractured continuum=20
drops away=20
edge of abyss scramble=20
slips and slides downed=20
past the once over=20
believed in a heading=20
meant for better times.=20

Won't be any=20
from discontinuance=20
jerked about=20
the whatever jives=20
slag all but dross=20
to diabolic crucibles=20
birthing never worlds.=20

Friends we thought=20
though never had=20
chanced to use=20
discards us useless=20
feign valued things
proved merely tools=20
for pry and press at.=20

Good times=20
to be imagined=20
reveal as tragic
knows no salvage=20
and none saved=20
past broken up
splits all apart.=20

A danger sights
safe harbours
where none abide
last chance ports
near set of Sun=20
sink beneath seas=20
of coldest earth.=20

Never a thought=20
could be again=20
except monstrous=20
surfaced waves=20
drag down=20
the mind adrift=20
into horrified dreams.=20

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080622C
------------=20

The only surprise=20
was you did not=20
and there was a crowd
as to all the usual.

We go down=20
into memorabilia=20
pastimes of loneliness=20
amid the interruptions.=20

 And who is at fault=20
forgetting details=20
in the late afternoons=20
as if those really matter.=20

They do matter=20
to the executioners
creating new rationales=20
for cutting off.=20

We are the condemned=20
condemning each other=20
with common excuses=20
for various lies.=20

When truth be told
it is not a face=20
we want to see=20
peering across our wall.=20

We are the auto-dialed=20
romantic disappointment
demographic statistics=20
made to feel indifferent.=20

Not really the good times=20
we say that it was=20
failing to declare=20
our desires at any border.=20

We cross over=20
looking for specials=20
that we cannot find=20
on either side.=20

No one wants to hear=20
what any of the truth is=20
and we all know=20
only the crazy would say.

We hide our madness=20
greedily keeping everything=20
horded to ourselves=20
as intellectual property.=20

We love everyone=20
that we do not like=20
who keeps their distance=20
and does not say.=20

We pay for it all=20
so we are able to claim
we have been observed
out among others.=20

It is the recluse=20
that is seen as suspect
always hiding something
from curious crowds.=20

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