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I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. While we are postponing, life speeds by. I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies. Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens. Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning. Luck is the residue of design. Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks. Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. The Eskimo has fifty-two names for snow because it is important to them; there ought to be as many
  for love. Wit is educated insolence. Memory is a child walking along a seashore. You neve
 r can tell what small pebble it will pick up and store away among its treasured things. In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite. If you find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere. Wit is educated insolence. Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you help them to become what they are capable of being. You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating. If a man does his best, what else is there? Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do. Success usuall
 y comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it A mathematician is a device for tur
 ning coffee into theorems. Love is always bestowed as a gift - freel
y, willingly and without expectation. We don't love to be loved; we love to love. Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you help them to become what they are capable of being. God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh. Sometimes our light goes out but is blown into flame by another human being. Each of us owes deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this light. Love is the energy of the soul. Love is what heals the personality. There is nothing that cannot be healed by love. There is nothing but love. A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship. A positive attitude will not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a shp, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a w
 all, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve 
 equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects. To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered. The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober. I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered. Touch is the most fundamental sense. A baby experiences it, all over, before he is born and long after he learns to use sight, hearing, or taste, and no human ever ceases to need it. Keep your children
  short on pocket money - but long on hugs. True friendship comes when the silence between 
 two people is comfortable. The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its t
eaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense. A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years. Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving us wordy evidence of the fact. I'll moider da bum. If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe. Love is the beauty of the soul. Can miles truly separate you from friends... If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there? Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street. Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'. When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite. Don't be so humble - you are not that great. Facts are the enemy of truth. He who has a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'. The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober. Each problem that I solved 
 became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems. If you ever reach total enl
 ightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose. The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good. Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler. One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important. Everything has been figured out, except how to live. Sleep is an excellent way of listening to an opera. Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches. Luck is the residue of design. This book fills a much-needed gap. The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work. Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working. C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg. I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can
  write faster than anybody who can write better. Three o'clock is always too late or too e
 arly for anything you want to do. We didn't lose the game; we just r
an out of time. Wit is educated insolence. What the world really needs is more love and less paper work. While we are postponing, life speeds by. Problems worthy of attack prove their worth by fighting back. Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny. Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains. Everything has been figured out, except how to live. Don't be so humble - you are not that great. Love takes up where knowledge leaves off. Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you. Not because they are nice, but because you are. The man who says I told you so is making an excuse for not expressing his position clearly in the first place. Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens. Tragedy i
 s when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die. The artist is 
 nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. True friendship comes when the silence between two people is comfortable. Dancing is silent poetry. A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation. What the world really needs is more love and less paper work. I would have made a good Pope. Reduce the complexity of life by eliminating the needless wants of life, and the labors of life reduce themselves. I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'. I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it. Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away. It was the exp
 erience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion. There are peopl
 e in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in t
he form of bread.