EDIT - OR - Cascade Designs Therma-Rest NeoAir All Season - Duane Lawrence

 
 Hi Duane!
 
  
 
 I’ll be your editor for this OR. Thanks for submitting it. There are quite a few edits…just take them one at a time and you’ll get through it fine. Due to the amount of edits, please email me directly your finished report prior to posting for final approval and in case I missed any during this first go-around.
 
  
 
 The edits are in the usual format of 
 
 EDIT - must change
 
 Edit – my recommended change if you agree
 
 Comment – is just that
 
  
 
 Comments - good html and photos. I read that you’ll be adding the measured weight prior to posting once you are able to secure another scale so please remember to complete that. 
 
  
 
 EDIT - You need to list the additional items that came with your mattress if any and if none, which are optional (IE storage bag, mini pump and patch kit for example are common). You do make a vague reference in a sentence that needs addressing below about the storage bag used to inflate the mattress which is as close as you come.
 
  
 
 Adding that the product is made in China as in the mini pump or that the mattress is made in the USA are important to many readers – including me as it does factor into my purchasing choices.
 

 Warrantee information and cleaning instruction  and cleaning experiences are very helpful - please add as required
 
  
 
 From your report title - “Cascade Designs Therma-Rest NeoAir All Season”
 
 EDIT – “Therm-a-Rest” Please double check throughout your report as there are more of the same issue throughout your report.
 
  
 
 Under product heading - “$159.95 USD”
 
 EDIT – “$” and “USD” mean the same thing so you can remove one or the other. Since “$” is pretty universally known, I would remove “USD” in this case.
 
  
 
 “Listed Weight – 540 g (1 lbs 3 oz)
 
 EDIT – you are listing metric first here but the rest of your report is listing metric second. Please switch around here so you’re consistent throughout. Even if the mfg lists it this way, you’re still showing the exact same info so it doesn’t matter that your report shows metric second.
 
   
 
 “Dinier Polyester Diamond Ripstop”
 
 EDIT – Denier
 
  
 
 “70 Dinier Nylon”
 
 EDIT – Denier
 
  
 
 “Therma-Rest has been around for along time now and this is my second mattress from this company.”
 
 EDITs – “Therm-a-Rest” and change [along] to “a long” (two words)
 
  
 
 “It is made of a 75d Polyester diamond ripstop nylon top layer which is designed to prevent the sleeper from sliding off, with a 70d Nylon core and bottom.”
 
 EDIT – Polyester Diamond Ripstop Nylon to match how the mfg lists it
 
 Comment - Having read through the mfg website and downloadable brochure, I can’t find where their design was to prevent the sleeper from sliding off the mattress. 
 
  
 
 “Cascade Designs uses, what they refer to as a "reflective ThermaCapture" technology that is designed to trap radian heat in a triangular core matrix that minimizes convective heat loss.”
 
 EDIT – [radiant] spelling
 
  
 
 “The use of nylon and polyester allows the used to inflate the mattress without having to worry about moisture buildup in the interior of the mattress which could reduce the insulative value of the mattress.”
 
 EDIT – allows the user [not used]
 
 “I have been using the NeoAir All season for about three years now and have accumulated around forty nights on the mattress.”
 
 EDIT – All Season [capitalize Season]
 
  
 
 “Temperatures ranged from -25 C (-13 F) in the mountains of the southern Canadian Rockies and northern Montana to +35 C (95 F) in deserts of eastern Uhta.”
 
 EDITs – Utah [spelling] additionally, there needs to be a reference that these trips occurred in the USA for our international readers
 
  
 
 “At the end of the day I finally realized that I needed to keep it fully inflated, slightly less then rock hard, to get the best night sleep I could get.”
 
 EDIT – replace [then] with [than]
 
  
 
 “In the summer it keep me warm without me overheating.“
 
 EDIT -  replace [keep] with [kept]
 
  
 
 “When I first purchased the mattress I was concerned about it's overall durability, specifically surrounding whether or not it would be easily punctured.”
 
 EDIT – replace [it’s] with [its] to show possession use “its”  (it’s is the same as “it is” )
 
  
 
 “I was also happy that it fit relatively well into my ThermaRest Trecker Chair.”
 
 EDITs – Therm-a-Rest - additionally – Trekker [spelling]
 
  
 
 “One of the best feature of this mattress is it's weight and packability.”
 
 EDITs – features (with an s) additionally replace [it’s] with [its] (it’s is short for it is and hence makes no sense saying “it is weight and packability”)  
 
 
 
 “The mattress came with a storage bag that could be used to inflate the mattress without having to directly blowing into it but I have chosen to discard the bag and use a strap.”
 
 EDIT/comment -   The storage bag can be used to inflate the mattress?? I believe you mean the mini pump can inflate the mattress and separate this into two sentences as you talk about two different items that come with the mattress. Whichever, please rewrite this sentence to match.
 
  
 
 “I found that the storage/inflation bag work well but did not keep that mattress compressed for storage and the bag just became extra weight.”
 
 EDIT – [worked well] to keep your tenses correct
 
  
 
 “The rolled mattress is small enough to fit anywhere inside my backpack and its light weight is great especially during multi-day hikes or back country ski trips”
 
 Edit – backcountry [one word]
 
  
 
 “In all I am expecting to get many years of comfortable nights of the NeoAir and am very pleased with all aspects of this mattress.”
 
 EDIT -  In all I am expecting to get many years of comfortable nights ([with] or [on]) the NeoAir and am very pleased with all aspects of this mattress. 
 
 “Pros and Cons”
 
 EDIT – please separate your Pros and Cons so you identify which you think are which.
 
  
 
 Ok, so that’s what I found so far. Please remember to email me directly with your edited report for final review prior to posting and I’ll look at it again.
 
 Thank you
 
 Mike
 
 mosack[at]earthlink[dot]net