Edit/Approval - Marmot Crystalline Jacket - Marina Batzke

"[email protected] [BackpackGearTest]" <[email protected]>
Newsgroups gmane.culture.backpacking.backpackgeartest
Message-ID <[email protected]>
Hi Marina,  
  
 A Brownie Point for you! Excellent Review. Edits below in the standard EDIT/Edit/Comment format. After revising you may upload to http://tinyurl.com/lsydsyq http://tinyurl.com/lsydsyq
  
 Cheers, Richard
 
  
  
 ### TESTER INFORMATION ###
 Edit: Consider adding measurements pertinent to a jacket – waist, torso, and sleeve length. Up to you.
  
 ### Marmot lists its trademark protected fabric at 20,000 mm in waterproof performance###
 Edit: trademark-protected [with a hyphen]
  
 ### <<IMAGE GOES HERE. ALT TEXT = "IMAGE 1"  IMAGE CAPTION = "Photo: From Marmot Mountain LLC website">> ###
 EDIT: Under our newly-announced policy, pictures from a manufacturer's website are no longer allowed in ORs. Please delete or replace with a photo of your own.
  
 ### The jacket has two side pockets that each close with a pull-up (non-waterresistant) zipper. ###
 EDIT: non-water resistant [Two words after the hyphen. I suspect that you combined the words to avoid a second hyphen, but together they are difficult to read.]
  
 ### Do not use fabric softener. Do not iron, bleach or dry clean the jacket. It is ok to tumble dry the jacket with all fasteners closed. ###
 EDIT: Re-phrase so this doesn't look like a quotation from Marmot's website. "Following the manufacturer's advice, I do not use fabric softener or bleach" or something like that.
  
 ###6 days September Bicycle Tour Innsbruck, Austria to Bozen, Italy: 61-79 F (16-26 C) ###
 Comment: I visited Bolzano last spring. Lovely city.
  
 ###2 days/1 night January  On-trail hiking West Fork Trail to Cogswell Dam, California, USA: 69 - 48 F (21 - 9 C)
  
 2 days/1 nights January On-trail hiking Piedra Blanca Trail to Twin Forks Camp, California, USA:  75 - 40 F (24 - 4 C)###
 Edit: On these last two you have the high temperature first; on all the others its low to high. Consider one or the other for all.
  
 ### During the six day bicycle trip in Austria and Italy, ###
 Edit: six-day [with a hyphen]
  
 ### Yet had I not gotten this jacket at a greatly discounted sales price, I would not have bought it at its MSRP of US $160. ###
 EDIT: Useful information but needs to be re-phrased, as BGT doesn't allow mention, even indirectly, of what one actually paid. Maybe "My only reservation about this jacket is its list price, which I consider expensive."
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