Re: Re: Introductions

"Chris Morris" <[email protected]>
Newsgroups gmane.culture.business.resistance-as-a-resource
Message-ID <008f01c31a75$2a6eb4e0$0100000a@chrismo>
> The theories are that they acted out of impulse, then create a belief
> (fantasy) about what they wish had happened.  I take from that that: 1)
> impulse does not come from belief, but just the opposite; and 2) the
thought
> that some of the struggles  with the conflict between impulse and belief
are
> caused when one creates the "fantasy" of acting against a belief in order
to
> somehow justify a negative outcome.

I think "acted out of impulse" can still have a belief underlying it. I
suppose some impulses are 'raw' enough to have nothing beneath it but maybe
some sort of physical trigger. And I wouldn't say the statement the child
makes about not breaking the broken object is a belief, but perhaps based on
the belief that lying is the best perceived option to take in that moment.
"If I tell the truth, I will definitely get in trouble. If I lie, I may get
out of it and I'll take that risk." Maturity should add a longer vision, "If
I lie, I may get out of it, but I know the importance of building and
retaining trust in a relationship, so while the truth will hurt now, it will
benefit me more in the future."

> I interpreted James' original
> comment -- "move on and stop blaming himself", to be more about trying to
> understand why the outcome was negative, rather than beating yourself  up
> over going against a belief (which could also be interepreted as a way of
> transferring the blame anyway).

I don't think beating myself up is good, neither is dismissing my
responsibility. There's, of course, a balance. My guess is James was
concerned that I was advocating beating himself up and I was concerned that
he was dismissing responsibility -- probably we're both (and you as well,
Ron) concerned about finding the right balance.

Chris
tech: http://clabs.org/blog
arts/faith: http://cministries.org/blog


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