Re: Re: Now we know the formula of resistance...

Peter Vajda <[email protected]> Thu, 25 Jan 2007 09:54:59 -0500
Newsgroups gmane.culture.business.resistance-as-a-resource
Message-ID <[email protected]>
--eOMyKLAClyYOlmw4KoLbH6MiMzqv2QSZEvZeKRD
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FWIW, some thoughts about procrastination...
(resistance is the reactivity to=20
anything--thought-word-deed-action-- that takes=20
us out of our own emotional comfort zone; almost always fear-based)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why am I constantly putting things off? Why don't=20
I do the things I'm "supposed" to do, but don't=20
really want to? Why do I always seem to be=20
forcing myself to do things? Whether it's chores=20
at home, work for school, or projects at work,=20
how do I get beyond procrastination? Most often,=20
something is operating "underneath" the=20
procrastination. Asking yourself these eight=20
questions and spending some conscious time=20
reflecting on your responses can help you uncover=20
why you are resisting doing what needs to be done=20
and support you to move beyond procrastination.

1. What are the benefits of completing a task and=20
what are the consequences of procrastinating?=20
Another way to ask this question is by exploring=20
these four additional questions: (1) what will=20
happen if I do this? (2) what won't happen if I=20
do this? (3) what will happen if I don't do this?=20
and (4) what won't happen if I don't do this?=20
Reflect on your responses and align with the=20
energy and positivity of right action, doing the=20
right thing, while visualizing successful completion.

2. What is my self-talk like? What are the=20
thoughts that support my resistance? Are my=20
thoughts positive and supporting, or limiting and=20
self-sabotaging? Moving to thoughts of joy,=20
appreciation and gratitude can support you to=20
experience an energy shift allowing you to take action.

3. What is my diet like? Do you experience lows,=20
lethargy, laziness and staleness after eating=20
certain foods or drinking certain liquids? Begin=20
to explore your relationship to food and drink and your energy and moods.

4. What is my Life Force (Chi) energy like?=20
Blocked, lacking, low? When one's life force=20
energy is blocked, there is usually some=20
disequilibrium among mind, body and spirit.=20
Movement which supports the flow of Chi energy=20
(such as Yoga and Tai Chi) can restore balance=20
and energy among mind, body and spirit, allowing=20
your Chi energy to flow which supports action and activity.

5. Am I depressed? You might want to have a=20
physical exam and ask for a professional opinion=20
to explore the possibility of a deeper malaise that may be affecting you.

6. What might be a competing committing that=20
keeps me from acting? In other words, there is=20
something I value more than the task I am=20
resisting. This competing commitment is usually=20
fear-based. As an example, a self-employed=20
entrepreneur is resisting organizing her physical=20
space, her office and work environment. When she=20
inquired into her resistance, by journaling=20
deeply into it, she discovered that when she=20
completed the organization of her space then her=20
next goal would be to focus on her business and=20
she was fearful about taking next steps to grow=20
her business. So her competing commitment was to=20
maintain the status quo and do nothing, to resist=20
and procrastinate. So, what might be something=20
you are valuing more, than the task at hand?

7. Am I "acting out" some childhood resistance,=20
as an adult? For example, if you were brought up=20
to believe that "neatness counts" or "you must be=20
organized", you might be rebelling against this=20
belief by not keeping an organized living or work=20
space. It's important to look "underneath" the=20
resistance to inquire about existing beliefs that=20
are driving you to procrastinate.

8. Am I attempting to maintain some self-image?=20
Many folks procrastinate in order to maintain a=20
positive self-image and be "good." In other=20
words, by procrastinating they exonerate=20
themselves from potential blame if something goes=20
wrong or does not work out as they hope, or plan.=20
In such circumstances, these folks delay taking=20
action in the face of deadlines.

These folks are poor self-managers and have=20
difficulty self-regulating. The may spend an=20
inordinate amount of time rationalizing=20
dysfunctional behaviors as they are resisting=20
"failure" in some way, shape or form. So, the=20
resistance shows up as the following behaviors=20
and attitudes: (1) Ignorance -- I didn't know I=20
was supposed to do that; (2) Skill deficiency --=20
"I don't know how"; (3) Apathy -- "I really don't=20
want to do" or, "It really doesn't make any=20
difference if I put this off." and "No one really=20
cares of I do this or not." or "I'm not in the=20
mood."; (5) Fixed habits and patterns -- "I've=20
always done it this way and it's hard to=20
change."; and "I know I can do it at the last=20
minute." or, "I work better under pressure."; (6)=20
Inertia -- "I just can=92t seem to get started.";=20
(7) Frail memory =96 "I just forgot."; (8) Physical=20
problems =96 "I was sick.; and (9) Perfectionism =96=20
"I can't get started as it won't be perfect."

Asking yourself these eight questions can support=20
you to get underneath procrastination and uncover=20
what's really, really at the root of your=20
inaction. By staying with your responses, and=20
inquiring deeply into them, you can begin to=20
raise your level of awareness about the nature of=20
your resistance and then create and take action=20
steps to move forward to both reduce and=20
eliminate the root causes of your resistance and=20
become a "doer" on a consistent basis.

Peace,
Peter Vajda, Ph.D.,  C.P.C.

SpiritHeart
Integrated Coaching & Practices
    for Essential Well-BE-ing
Values-Based Coaching, Counseling and Training
Mind-Body-Emotion-Spirit Integration
Atlanta, GA, USA; 770-804-9125; mailto:[email protected]
"What makes you think work and meditation are two different things?"
                 =97 Buddha at Work=20=20

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]


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            <p>FWIW, some thoughts about procrastination.<wbr>..<br>
(resistance is the reactivity to <br>
anything--thought-<wbr>word-deed-<wbr>action-- that takes <br>
us out of our own emotional comfort zone; almost always fear-based)<br>
<br>
~~~~~~~~~~~~<wbr>~<br>
Why am I constantly putting things off? Why don't <br>
I do the things I'm &quot;supposed&quot; to do, but don't <br>
really want to? Why do I always seem to be <br>
forcing myself to do things? Whether it's chores <br>
at home, work for school, or projects at work, <br>
how do I get beyond procrastination? Most often, <br>
something is operating &quot;underneath&quot; the <br>
procrastination. Asking yourself these eight <br>
questions and spending some conscious time <br>
reflecting on your responses can help you uncover <br>
why you are resisting doing what needs to be done <br>
and support you to move beyond procrastination.<br>
<br>
1. What are the benefits of completing a task and <br>
what are the consequences of procrastinating? <br>
Another way to ask this question is by exploring <br>
these four additional questions: (1) what will <br>
happen if I do this? (2) what won't happen if I <br>
do this? (3) what will happen if I don't do this? <br>
and (4) what won't happen if I don't do this? <br>
Reflect on your responses and align with the <br>
energy and positivity of right action, doing the <br>
right thing, while visualizing successful completion.<br>
<br>
2. What is my self-talk like? What are the <br>
thoughts that support my resistance? Are my <br>
thoughts positive and supporting, or limiting and <br>
self-sabotaging? Moving to thoughts of joy, <br>
appreciation and gratitude can support you to <br>
experience an energy shift allowing you to take action.<br>
<br>
3. What is my diet like? Do you experience lows, <br>
lethargy, laziness and staleness after eating <br>
certain foods or drinking certain liquids? Begin <br>
to explore your relationship to food and drink and your energy and moods.<b=
r>
<br>
4. What is my Life Force (Chi) energy like? <br>
Blocked, lacking, low? When one's life force <br>
energy is blocked, there is usually some <br>
disequilibrium among mind, body and spirit. <br>
Movement which supports the flow of Chi energy <br>
(such as Yoga and Tai Chi) can restore balance <br>
and energy among mind, body and spirit, allowing <br>
your Chi energy to flow which supports action and activity.<br>
<br>
5. Am I depressed? You might want to have a <br>
physical exam and ask for a professional opinion <br>
to explore the possibility of a deeper malaise that may be affecting you.<b=
r>
<br>
6. What might be a competing committing that <br>
keeps me from acting? In other words, there is <br>
something I value more than the task I am <br>
resisting. This competing commitment is usually <br>
fear-based. As an example, a self-employed <br>
entrepreneur is resisting organizing her physical <br>
space, her office and work environment. When she <br>
inquired into her resistance, by journaling <br>
deeply into it, she discovered that when she <br>
completed the organization of her space then her <br>
next goal would be to focus on her business and <br>
she was fearful about taking next steps to grow <br>
her business. So her competing commitment was to <br>
maintain the status quo and do nothing, to resist <br>
and procrastinate. So, what might be something <br>
you are valuing more, than the task at hand?<br>
<br>
7. Am I &quot;acting out&quot; some childhood resistance, <br>
as an adult? For example, if you were brought up <br>
to believe that &quot;neatness counts&quot; or &quot;you must be <br>
organized&quot;, you might be rebelling against this <br>
belief by not keeping an organized living or work <br>
space. It's important to look &quot;underneath&quot; the <br>
resistance to inquire about existing beliefs that <br>
are driving you to procrastinate.<br>
<br>
8. Am I attempting to maintain some self-image? <br>
Many folks procrastinate in order to maintain a <br>
positive self-image and be &quot;good.&quot; In other <br>
words, by procrastinating they exonerate <br>
themselves from potential blame if something goes <br>
wrong or does not work out as they hope, or plan. <br>
In such circumstances, these folks delay taking <br>
action in the face of deadlines.<br>
<br>
These folks are poor self-managers and have <br>
difficulty self-regulating. The may spend an <br>
inordinate amount of time rationalizing <br>
dysfunctional behaviors as they are resisting <br>
&quot;failure&quot; in some way, shape or form. So, the <br>
resistance shows up as the following behaviors <br>
and attitudes: (1) Ignorance -- I didn't know I <br>
was supposed to do that; (2) Skill deficiency -- <br>
&quot;I don't know how&quot;; (3) Apathy -- &quot;I really don't <br>
want to do&quot; or, &quot;It really doesn't make any <br>
difference if I put this off.&quot; and &quot;No one really <br>
cares of I do this or not.&quot; or &quot;I'm not in the <br>
mood.&quot;; (5) Fixed habits and patterns -- &quot;I've <br>
always done it this way and it's hard to <br>
change.&quot;; and &quot;I know I can do it at the last <br>
minute.&quot; or, &quot;I work better under pressure.&quot;; (6) <br>
Inertia -- &quot;I just can=92t seem to get started.&quot;; <br>
(7) Frail memory =96 &quot;I just forgot.&quot;; (8) Physical <br>
problems =96 &quot;I was sick.; and (9) Perfectionism =96 <br>
&quot;I can't get started as it won't be perfect.&quot;<br>
<br>
Asking yourself these eight questions can support <br>
you to get underneath procrastination and uncover <br>
what's really, really at the root of your <br>
inaction. By staying with your responses, and <br>
inquiring deeply into them, you can begin to <br>
raise your level of awareness about the nature of <br>
your resistance and then create and take action <br>
steps to move forward to both reduce and <br>
eliminate the root causes of your resistance and <br>
become a &quot;doer&quot; on a consistent basis.<br>
<br>
Peace,<br>
Peter Vajda, Ph.D.,  C.P.C.<br>
<br>
SpiritHeart<br>
Integrated Coaching &amp; Practices<br>
    for Essential Well-BE-ing<br>
Values-Based Coaching, Counseling and Training<br>
Mind-Body-Emotion-<wbr>Spirit Integration<br>
Atlanta, GA, USA; 770-804-9125; mailto:<a href=3D"mailto:pvajda%40spirithea=
rt.net">pvajda@spiritheart.<wbr>net</a><br>
&quot;What makes you think work and meditation are two different things?&qu=
ot;<br>
                 =97 Buddha at Work  <br>
<br>
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]<br>
<br>
</p>
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s=3D142&g=3D2&.sig=3D0jjmQb3HYr6j5BKdmHOWng">Business finance course</a></l=
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MTJjdHAwbnQzBF9TAzk3MzU5NzE0BF9wAzUEZ3JwSWQDOTQ3NDQwNgRncnBzcElkAzE3MDUwMDQ=
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