The Straight Dope 02/17/2006

The Straight Dope -- By Cecil Adams
http://www.straightdope.com

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THE STRAIGHT DOPE 02/17/2006

Dear Cecil:

In 1989, when I was a freshman at Baylor University in Texas, I was
driving one evening to meet friends for dinner. I came over a hill and
noticed a car on its last of several flips in a ditch on the side of the
road. I quickly pulled over. The driver jumped out screaming--his buddy
in the passenger seat had been thrown from the car. Another person
stopped and noticed a body pinned under the front bumper in the ditch. I
grabbed the driver's side of the car and lifted it up four-or-so feet,
long enough to realize the guy was unfortunately dead. --howardcrut, via
the Straight Dope Message Board

About 15 years ago I had a friend named Jerry who was about six-six and
one of the strongest people I ever knew. He picked up cars regularly. I
don't mean completely off the ground, but I do mean two wheels. He
lifted the right half of my 1988 Toyota Corolla GT-S about 12 inches off
the ground. --Cheeop, via the Straight Dope Message Board

I am Anthony Vincent Cavallo II. I am writing you because I can. My mom
did save my life! The story was a little off. The wheel was never
removed from the car, the rear suspension spring was (that's what holds
up the rear of the car). I was clamped between the top of the rear wheel
and the top of the fender. My mom may not have lifted it a full four
inches, but she held it up so friends could get a jack under it and pull
me out. Ironically I have continued my automotive education and now run
five Goodyear tire stores. --Anthony V. Cavallo II, via e-mail

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Cecil replies:

That was part of your automotive education? Man, kids think their
homework now is a bitch. Thanks to testimonials like yours plus a little
additional investigation, I'm now ready to deliver my solemn judgment on
superhuman strength. (The Straight Dope: SuperMom: Could a mother
actually lift a car to save her child?)  First a last few facts:

For more, see:
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/060217.html

STAFF REPORT

Dear Straight Dope:

The other day, I was reminded of the fact that many cultures use dried
cow, yak and buffalo manure as fuel. I was wondering: Can the feces of
other species (including humans) be used for fuel as well? The heating
bills are going to start piling up as winter comes, and I thought a bit
of recycling might be in order . . . --Dave Wilbur

SDSTAFF Una replies:

The waste products of most animals can be used as fuel, and likely have
been at one time or another. This isn't just in so-called primitive
cultures, either--many technologically modern nations have studied and
implemented both animal and human waste combustion.

Although you might wonder why anyone would burn hippopotamus manure or
human waste given the many other fuel sources available, two very good
reasons drive their utilization. First, animal and human waste is
generally considered a renewable energy source and thus can be burned as
"green power," giving the entity combusting the waste (as well as the
country in which it resides) a political or treaty-fulfilling credit for
reducing greenhouse-gas emissions. Second, some cities and regions have
limited landfill or wastewater treatment capacity, and burning the waste
can reduce the load on their waste disposal facilities. Other benefits
from burning these waste products can include tax credits for using
renewable energy sources and good public relations karma. Still another
benefit is that burning animal waste can prevent its decomposition into
methane, a greenhouse gas that's much worse for the environment than
carbon dioxide.

For more, see: 
http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mmanurefuel.html

STRAIGHT DOPE CLASSIC - 06/23/1989

Dear Cecil: 

Forget cremation, forget embalming--when I go, I want to go in style.
For some time now, I've been wondering how to get my mortal remains
fossilized. I know that soft tissue doesn't normally fossilize, but
there must be some exceptions: for example, the Petrified Forest in
Arizona. What kind of conditions are necessary, and how long will it
take? Our Creationist friends are of the opinion that fossils are
remains of animals that existed before the Flood; does that mean a man
can become a fossil in a couple thousand years? --Forever Young, San
Pedro, California  

Dear Forever:  

Oh, I dunno. In my experience, with the right fluids, you can get
pretty fossilized in about two hours. Unfortunately for our
purposes, the effect usually isn't permanent. For long-lasting 
results you need more elaborate techniques. But first we'd
better define our terms.  

Strictly speaking, a fossil is any vestige of past life embedded
in the earth's crust. This includes the frozen mammoths of 
Siberia, whose bodies were preserved soft tissue and all. It
just so happens I have here a slender volume entitled How to Deep-Freeze
a Mammoth by Bjorn Kurten. Though largely a whimsical meditation on
archaeology, the book does offer a few practical hints for prospective
fossilees: 

For more, see:
http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a3_042.html

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