The Straight Dope 07/05/11

The Straight Dope -- By Cecil Adams
http://www.straightdope.com

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THE STRAIGHT DOPE 05/11/2007

Dear Cecil:

I read recently that "time . . . passes more quickly when gravity is
reduced." Assuming gravity is reduced at higher altitudes, that means time
goes by faster in Santa Fe than in Poughkeepsie. What's up with
that?--Chris in SF, NM

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Cecil replies:

You heard right, Chris. But unless you're way more anal than anybody I
want living in my reference frame, you won't have to reset your watch. Due
to the "warpage of time," clocks run slower in Poughkeepsie than Santa Fe
by about a millisecond. Per century. (Get friendly with a black hole and
it's another story--gravitational time dilation approaches infinity as you
near the event horizon. However, notwithstanding sporadic distortions of
space-time due to Taos, Los Alamos, Roswell, etc, we'll assume that's not
a problem for you in New Mexico.) Time dilation affects not just ordinary
clocks but any measure of time, including how long it takes to say "one
Mississippi, two Mississippi." So you'll never notice anything odd about
SF time, only about that of people living under different gravity
conditions, e.g., Poughkeepsie, Hoboken, or other low burgs.

The effect was first hypothesized by Albert Einstein in 1907 as . . .

For more, see:
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/070511.html

STAFF REPORT

Dear Straight Dope:

As a gambling degenerate, I've spent weeks trying to figure out what
casino game gives the house the worst advantage. I assume all games are in
the house's favor, but which game gives me the best odds? Is there any
strategy to roulette, the game that makes me rich in ten minutes and broke
in five? What about slot machines--are some better than others?--Sam

SDSTAFF Bricker responds:

As the WOPR computer in War Games says: "The only way to win is not to
play." Casino games are almost always designed to favor the house. The
flashing lights, opulent penthouse suites, and big-name stage shows aren't
paid for by a business that runs at a loss.

The odds for any bet on any table game can easily be computed
mathematically. While no casino game under normal circumstances will make
you a winner in the long run, there are several speeds at which you can
lose. More about the "normal circumstances" caveat presently.

First some ground rules. 

For more, see: 
http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mhouseodds.htm

STRAIGHT DOPE CLASSIC - 01/16/1990

Dear Cecil: 

Is there such a thing as cow tipping? I have two friends, both sons of
farmers. One says it can be done and is great sport. The other says no
way. Do cows sleep standing up? Can they be tipped? I suppose this will
take some late night research.--Robert Schreur, Baltimore

Dear Robert:

Don't look at me, pal. Fortunately for the cause of science, not all
researchers are handicapped by an instinct for survival. It appears there
really is a rural pastime called cow tipping, which is favored by
likkered-up country kiddies with nothing better to do on a Saturday night.
(One presumes the sheep were busy.) The cow is easy prey for pranksters since it's one of a number of critters (the horse is another) that sleeps
standing up with its knees locked.

I recently discussed the fine points of cow tipping with a reformed
ex-tipper named Robin, who had done it (once) as a student. Robin had
attended Albion College in Michigan, a school so snooty it's said the
students read The Preppie Handbook without realizing it was satirical.
Despite their pretensions, however, Albionians were mad for cow tipping.

For more, see:
http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a3_363.html

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