The Straight Dope 03/28/2003

The Straight Dope -- By Cecil Adams
http://www.straightdope.com

You are subscribed as: [[email protected]]

To unsubscribe CLICK on the URL below this line:
mailto:[email protected]
If you can't "click" above, then send a blank email to:
[email protected]
____________________________________________
THE STRAIGHT DOPE 03/28/2003

Dear Cecil:

What is the bottom line with Koko the gorilla's ability to
learn sign language? I know she only communicates through
her handler, who seems to engage in a great deal of
subjective translation. I saw an excerpt in Harper's
Magazine of a supposed Internet chat with Koko a few years
ago that made me rather dubious that the gorilla was capable
of any use of language. Nonetheless, there is a strong
perception out there that Koko has learned to sign. What is
the straight dope? --Fabian Braithwaite

~~~~~~
Looking for the perfect gift for that wedding, birthday, or
bar mitzvah? Straight Dope books are the very thing! See
http://www.straightdope.com/store.html
~~~~~~

Cecil replies:

Don't be too hard on Koko, Fabian. If you judged strictly
from Internet chat, you'd have to question the linguistic
abilities of many humans. (D00dz!) Scientists have debated
for years whether gorillas really understand language or are
just, you know, aping us. The consensus among animal
researchers seems to be that they understand at some level,
but are less adept at using language themselves. When I read
transcripts of Koko's alleged conversations I often think:
Jeez, a trained monkey could do better.

For more, see:
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/030328.html


STAFF REPORT

Dear Straight Dope:

For the last few years, I've read things about the famed
camel spider or wind scorpion (Eremobates gladiolus) in the
Middle East. From pictures I've seen, it's a little bigger
than your hand and very aggressive. Here's what I've heard
that I can't verify conclusively: 

It can run upwards of 25 mph (by soldiers that have
tracked the speed with humvees since it runs in their
shadows). 

It's called a camel spider because it climbs onto the
bellies of camels and eats the stomach--because the spider
secretes anesthetics to numb the flesh, the camels
don't notice until their intestines fall out. 

It makes a screaming/squealing noise when it runs,
similar to a child screaming. 

So, pretty much the most horrifying thing you can
imagine. How much of this is true? How horrible is it
really? --Christian Vanderbeck 

SDSTAFF Doug replies:

Doesn't this sound like the perfect topic for today, April
Fool's Day? We thought you'd appreciate it.

Urban legends about the camel spider (properly termed a     
solpugid or solifugid) are as old as the proverbial hills,
but they made a huge resurgence when vectored by
American troops in Kuwait during Desert Storm. They're not
quite as big as your hand (unless you're a
five-year-old), and very shy and secretive. They do like     
to hide in the shadows, and they do run very, very quickly
for a critter. 

For more, see: 
http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mcamelspider.html

STRAIGHT DOPE CLASSIC - 05131977

Dear Cecil: 

Being typical college students, my friends and I were
sitting in my room this Friday discussing our favorite
childhood toothpaste brands. One of us recalled Stripe
toothpaste, which was characterized by its incredibly
straight red lines. We started joking about cans of polka
dot paint and the like when it suddenly occurred to us that
we had no idea how the lines came out so straight. Cecil,
could you tell us how this seemingly impossible feat was
accomplished? --Tom G., Evanston, Illinois

Dear Tom:

There is little, it seems, that the mind of man can't
accomplish once it sets itself to a task. Striped
toothpaste is only a beginning.  

For more, see:
http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a1_173.html

____________________________________________
Here's how you can get your OWN FREE Subscription:
Send a blank mailto:[email protected]
____________________________________________
Copyright 1995 - 2003 Chicago Reader, Inc.
All Rights Reserved
You may forward this document by email ONLY if you
include the entire document INCLUDING the information
at the bottom of this publication
____________________________________________
Visit our good friends at Joke A Day http://www.jokeaday.com
They're kind enough to mail THE STRAIGHT DOPE for us.
Join the World's Largest Daily Humor List and receive daily
laughs in your email by sending mailto:[email protected]