Re: the Al-Gebra Network...?
Yamanoor Srihari <yamanoor-/[email protected]> Wed, 25 Feb 2004 19:15:32 -0800 (PST)
| Newsgroups | gmane.culture.region.india.general |
|---|---|
| Message-ID | <[email protected]> |
--0-744585797-1077765332=:22133 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Americans are always like that. They have a despicable, often sympathize-able lack of general knowledge. They would be surprised at anything. Starting from their first citizen (ha ha) I am sure the majority of their population cannot even point out where Afghanistan is, or what Al - Qaida means. Two years of living here has taught me that the Americans worth knowing or respecting for their general knowledge are so far and few apart, that you could institute awards for them... Srihari "M.S. Suresh" <[email protected]> wrote: Post 9/11, the US immig. system came under exhaustive journalistic speculative perception that it was so perfect to have even processed and awarded a VISA to the al-quaida operative who rammed that passenger vessel into the twin towers. Personally, i would commend such a system - a system so perfect that it can function on its own, take care of the 'procedures' on its own, without requiring any interventions from us "flawed imperfect and weak humans who think in such three dimensional terms" (quote courtesy: dialogue of the Borg Queen, Star Trek - First Contact). Subsequently, we have heard their homeland security being so perfect that they would withhold Grocers, Librarians and Mr. Kamal Hasan (a south indian movie actor) on suspicion that they might have links with al-quaida. One can likewise appreciate why they are so capable of inventing pathetically unfortunate jokes about blonde girls just as Indians do about sikhs (guys with the turbans!). Having said all that, it is least surprizing if their "Homeland Security" sounded a 'red alert' about "Al-Gebra: a new terrorist network" and immediately set off a series of 'high level crisis management' initiatives to "smoke them out of their holes" (dialogue courtesy: it is "that guy from the Ranch", obviously!). Please find an email below about "Al-Gebra"; many thanks to the person who forwarded this which set me thinking on the above lines. One friend in the US was shocked to know that there are people in India who know about computers; while another senior colleague of mine complemented me for my 'expertize' on how to open and close files in MS Word that he didnot know about, while still, an american journal speculated that George W. Bush Jr. doesnot know a thing about India, that he has named his cat so; can anyone dare question the ignorance of the big brother?! After all, all of us are "flawed imperfect and weak humans who think in such three dimensional terms"! MSS -----forwarded message----- At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference,Attorney general John Ashcroft said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of maths instruction. "Al-Gebra is a fearsome cult,", Ashcroft said. "They desire average solutions by means of extremes and sometimes go off on tangents in a search for absolute value. They use secret code names like "x" and "y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of the medieval , with coordinates in every country. "As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides to every triangle," Ashcroft declared. When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of maths instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes. "I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to disintegrate us with calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love to inflict plane on every sphere of influence," the President said, adding: "Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root, make our point, and draw the line." President Bush warned, "These weapons of maths instruction have the potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never before seen ,unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to factor-in random facts of vertex." Attorney General Ashcroft said, "As our Great Leader would say, read my ellipse. Here is one principle he is uncertainty of: though they continue to multiply, their days are numbered , as the hypotenuse tightens around their necks." ----- --------------------------------- Yahoo! Groups Links To visit your group on the web, go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/iluIndia/ To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to: [email protected] Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service. La vie.. http://www.stanford.edu/~yamanoor http://yamanoor.tblog.com --------------------------------- Do you Yahoo!? Get better spam protection with Yahoo! Mail --0-744585797-1077765332=:22133 Content-Type: text/html; charset=US-ASCII Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit <html><body> <DIV>Americans are always like that. They have a despicable, often sympathize-able lack of general knowledge. They would be surprised at anything. Starting from their first citizen (ha ha) I am sure the majority of their population cannot even point out where Afghanistan is, or what Al - Qaida means. Two years of living here has taught me that the Americans worth knowing or respecting for their general knowledge are so far and few apart, that you could institute awards for them...</DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV>Srihari<BR><BR><B><I>"M.S. Suresh" <[email protected]></I></B> wrote:</DIV> <BLOCKQUOTE class=replbq style="PADDING-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; BORDER-LEFT: #1010ff 2px solid"><TT><BR>Post 9/11, the US immig. system came under exhaustive journalistic speculative perception <BR>that it was so perfect to have even processed and awarded a VISA to the al-quaida operative <BR>who rammed that passenger vessel into the twin towers.<BR><BR>Personally, i would commend such a system - a system so perfect that it can function on its <BR>own, take care of the 'procedures' on its own, without requiring any interventions from us <BR>"flawed imperfect and weak humans who think in such three dimensional terms" (quote <BR>courtesy: dialogue of the Borg Queen, Star Trek - First Contact).<BR><BR>Subsequently, we have heard their homeland security being so perfect that they would <BR>withhold Grocers, Librarians and Mr. Kamal Hasan (a south indian movie actor) on suspicion < BR>that they might have links with al-quaida.<BR><BR>One can likewise appreciate why they are so capable of inventing pathetically unfortunate <BR>jokes about blonde girls just as Indians do about sikhs (guys with the turbans!).<BR><BR>Having said all that, it is least surprizing if their "Homeland Security" sounded a 'red <BR>alert' about "Al-Gebra: a new terrorist network" and immediately set off a series of 'high <BR>level crisis management' initiatives to "smoke them out of their holes" (dialogue courtesy: <BR>it is "that guy from the Ranch", obviously!).<BR><BR>Please find an email below about "Al-Gebra"; many thanks to the person who forwarded this <BR>which set me thinking on the above lines.<BR><BR>One friend in the US was shocked to know that there are people in India who know about <BR>computers; while another senior colleague of mine complemented me for my 'expertize' on how <BR>to open and close files in MS Word that he didnot know about, while still, an american <BR>jo urnal speculated that George W. Bush Jr. doesnot know a thing about India, that he has <BR>named his cat so; can anyone dare question the ignorance of the big brother?! After all, <BR>all of us are "flawed imperfect and weak humans who think in such three dimensional terms"!<BR><BR>MSS<BR><BR>-----forwarded message-----<BR><BR> At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later<BR>discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to<BR>board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a<BR>setsquare, a slide rule and a calculator.<BR><BR> At a morning press conference,Attorney general John Ashcroft said<BR>he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement.<BR>He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of maths<BR>instruction.<BR><BR> "Al-Gebra is a fearsome cult,", Ashcroft said. "They desire<BR>average solutions by means of extremes and sometimes go off on<BR>tangents in a search for absolu te value. They use secret code names<BR>like "x" and "y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have<BR>determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of the<BR>medieval , with coordinates in every country.<BR><BR> "As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides<BR>to every triangle," Ashcroft declared.<BR><BR> When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God<BR>had wanted us to have better weapons of maths instruction, He would<BR>have given us more fingers and toes.<BR><BR> "I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is<BR>intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to<BR>disintegrate us with calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love to<BR>inflict plane on every sphere of influence," the President said,<BR>adding: "Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root,<BR>make our point, and draw the line."<BR><BR> President Bush warned, "These weapons of maths instruction have the<BR>potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never<BR>before seen ,unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin<BR>to factor-in random facts of vertex."<BR><BR> Attorney General Ashcroft said, "As our Great Leader would say,<BR>read my ellipse. Here is one principle he is uncertainty of:<BR>though they continue to multiply, their days are numbered , as the<BR>hypotenuse tightens around their necks."<BR><BR>-----<BR><BR><BR></TT></BLOCKQUOTE><BR><BR><DIV> <DIV> <DIV><FONT color=darkblue> <P align=left>La vie..</P> <P align=left><A href="http://www.stanford.edu/~yamanoor">http://www.stanford.edu/~yamanoor</A></P> <P align=left><A href="http://yamanoor.tblog.com">http://yamanoor.tblog.com</A></P> <P align=left> </P> <P align=left> </P></FONT></DIV></DIV></DIV><p><hr SIZE=1> Do you Yahoo!?<br> Get better spam protection with <a href="http://us.rd.yahoo.com/mailtag_us/*http://antispam.yahoo.com/tools">Yahoo! Mail</a> </body></html> --0-744585797-1077765332=:22133--