mr weasly i have have the answer to your question!

Veronica Williams <cmon_duck-/[email protected]> Tue, 23 Mar 2004 10:44:21 +1100 (EST)
Newsgroups gmane.culture.religion.christian.catholic.engadine-antioch
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Dear friends i found all the useless information and humerous documentation on the question Mr. Weasly asked Harry......what exactly is the function of a rubber duck!!!! 
 
If i'm pissing you off by posting this useless crap i don't care!!!! Squeeze my duck!!!!! 
 
 
 A Rubber Duck to Every BathroomThis seemed like a very good fixed idea  a long time ago: fanaticism can be rather fun and enjoyable, if it does not lead to any harm. This movement, dedicated to a single idea, only amuses people. This is exactly what it is designed to do. Fortunately, no one takes this movement seriously, except in a humourous manner. This is a cause I can make a difference in, and gives me great joy, and I hope I've made others smile in the process. That is indeed hard currency in this world. 
Goals: 
   Furnishing bathrooms with rubber ducks: This is done mostly with house-warming presents. A rubber duck is just as essential a furnishing as a shower/bath in a bathroom! One is allowed to give a rubber duck as a present to someone upon request, or if one feels the person is in need of a rubber duck. A new member should acquire a rubber duck ASAP after joining the movement. 
   The furthering of Rubber Duck knowledge. This refers to the knowledge of the Rubber Duck Standard and the proper use of a rubber duck. 
Back to Main Index Rubber duck links 
Cami wrote Aug 10th 1998




---------------------------------





A picture says more than a thousand words. That is why the Rubber Duck Standard is compressed into the image below/on the left. To be on the safe side, here it is in words: 
   A rubber duck is yellow with an orange beak. Other ducks are not genuine rubber ducks, only inferior copies of the real thing. 
   A rubber duck has to have good floating capabilities. It should always swim head up. Rubber ducks are no soakers. 
   Unfortunately, rubber ducks are not made out of rubber, but plastics is a good substitute, if it is soft and regains its shape after deformation the way rubber does. A rubber duck should never have dents on its body; it should always have a perfect shape. 
   A rubber duck may squeak. But it is not a required feature, only optional. A quiet duck is just as good, except if the sound is an onomatopoetic Quack!. A duck like this is superior. 

As rubberduck mannequin the rubber duck from kumiankka.cs.tut.fi by Panze 
  
 
  

---------------------------------



  Needless to say, a rubber duck should be used and treated properly. If not, it will caw in a sad manner, and will not greet with a happy "Quack!" those who come into the bathroom. Make sure your rubber duck stays happy by doing the following: 

   Prime Directive: Take your rubber duck to the bath with you at least once a month. For a rubber duck a bath with its master/mistress is heavenly and the reason to live. . Kumiankalle on taivaallista p&auml;&auml;st&auml; mukaan kylpyyn: se on kumiankan el&auml;m&auml;n t&auml;yttymys.-->
   Habitat: The bathroom. Preferably on the bathtub, but other spots in the bathroom will do. A duck detests sudden changes in its potential energy. So do place the duck in a place where it is safe from falling down to the floor. Don't put the duck in a place which is close to a heat-source (a hot light-bulb, for example) to avoid nasty disfiguration. This will most certainly make it furious. 
   What ever you do, don't allow your rubber duck to become dusty! Play with it. If you don't know how to do that, let someone else play with it. 
   A rubber duck enjoys company. Buy more rubber ducks, but other bath toys will do, too. The favourite sport of the rubber duck is synchronized floating :-) 
  
 
  
 


---------------------------------


  
  I had a yellow rubber duck when I was a kid. According to my mother it is tucked away in a box somewhere. I want to find that duck and bring it back to its natural habitat, that is my bathroom. 
So all you Freudians, you were right!:-D  Joten kaikki Freudistit, t&auml;ss&auml;kin on syyp&auml;&auml;n&auml; lapsuusajan kokemukset!-->
At a later stage in my life, as a student when I finally began to allow myself to be a bit off the beaten track and weird and actually enjoy it :-), my fondness of rubber ducks re-emerged. 
I kept on looking for rubberducks in the stores but found none until I finally found one. It was not in accordance with the standard, but it had to do until I found the Real Thing, which I finally did and I was overjoyed. I now have four rubber ducks in my bathroom. 
Friends moved and moved together and had housewarming parties. As a rubberduckist I wanted to give them rubberducks, because they had everything else that is needed in a household (=they had been on their own for long enough to accumulate a whole set of household essentials (except for the bathroom;-) and non-essentials). I gather the original meaning of housewarming presents was to help the person(s) to equip their home. 
My strange passion has stirred up a fair amount of amusement among my friends, and they have been delighted to receive a rubber duck. This way I want to spare them from the rubber duck trauma, which became so familiar to me before I obtained a rubberduck. Whatever the case, at least this is an original and funny present.  Kumiankkapinttym&auml;ni on her&auml;tt&auml;nytsen verran hilpeytt&auml; tuttava- ja kaveripiiriss&auml;ni, ett&auml;ovat olleet iloisia saadessaan oman, standardinmukaisen kumiankan. T&auml;ll&auml;tavoin haluan s&auml;&auml;st&auml;&auml; heit&auml;kumiankkatraumalta, joka vainosi minua kunnes sain kumiankan. Sit&auml;paitsise on ainakin erilainen ja ep&auml;tyls&auml; tuparilahja. -->
  




---------------------------------


  
  
  
 
  
   Links featuring rubber ducks: Kumiankka (Rubberduck), Panze's internet-server (in Finnish) 
The Rubberduckproject (in Finnish?), or convincing the Finnish broadcasting companies to air Babylon 5 
Leopold's B5-ducks (stuff in English, too). 
Duck humour from Babylon 5 (stuff in English). Contains duckless humour (in Finnish) as well. 
References to ducks on B5 

  





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<DIV><FONT face="Comic Sans MS">Dear friends i found all the useless information and humerous documentation on the question Mr. Weasly asked Harry......what exactly is the function of a rubber duck!!!! </FONT></DIV>
<DIV>&nbsp;</DIV>
<DIV><FONT face="Comic Sans MS">If i'm pissing you off by posting this useless crap i don't care!!!! Squeeze my duck!!!!! <IMG src="http://us.i1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/tsmileys2/09.gif"></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face="Comic Sans MS"></FONT>&nbsp;</DIV>
<DIV><FONT face="Comic Sans MS"></FONT>&nbsp;</DIV>
<CENTER><A name=Rubberduck-frontpage></A><FONT face="Comic Sans MS"><IMG height=99 src="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duck_hap.gif" width=78 align=center></FONT> <FONT size=+3>A Rubber Duck to Every Bathroom</FONT></CENTER>
<DIV>This seemed like a very good fixed idea &nbsp;<A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#History">a long time ago: </A>fanaticism can be rather fun and enjoyable, if it does not lead to any harm. This movement, dedicated to a single idea, only amuses people. This is exactly what it is designed to do. Fortunately, no one takes this movement seriously, except in a humourous manner. This is a cause I can make a difference in, and gives me great joy, and I hope I've made others smile in the process. That is indeed hard currency in this world. </DIV>
<H3><B>Goals: </B></H3>
<UL>
<LI><B>Furnishing bathrooms with rubber ducks: </B>This is done mostly with house-warming presents. A rubber duck is just as essential a furnishing as a shower/bath in a bathroom! One is allowed to give a rubber duck as a present to someone upon request, or if one feels the person is in need of a rubber duck. A new member should acquire a rubber duck ASAP after joining the movement. 
<LI><B>The furthering of Rubber Duck knowledge.</B> This refers to the knowledge of the <FONT color=#000000><A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#STD Duck">Rubber Duck Standard</A> and the <A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#Manual">proper use</A> of a rubber duck. </LI></UL>
<DIV>
<TABLE>
<TBODY>
<TR>
<TD noWrap><A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/index.htm#Main">Back to Main Index</A> </TD>
<TD width="15%"></TD>
<TD><A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#Ducklinks">Rubber duck links </A></TD>
<TD>
<P><I><SMALLER>Cami wrote Aug 10th 1998</P></I></SMALLER>
<P></P></TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE></DIV>
<DIV>
<HR width="100%">
</DIV>
<DIV><BR><A name="STD Duck"></A><BR></DIV>
<P>A picture says more than a thousand words. That is why the Rubber Duck Standard is compressed into the image below/on the left. <IMG height=99 src="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duck_hap.gif" width=78 align=left border=0>To be on the safe side, here it is in words: 
<UL>
<LI>A rubber duck is yellow with an orange beak. Other ducks are not genuine rubber ducks, only inferior copies of the real thing. 
<LI>A rubber duck has to have good floating capabilities. It should always swim head up. Rubber ducks are no soakers. <!--Kumiankalla tulee olla hyv&auml;t kelluntaominaisuudet:ts, sen tulee aina uida oikein p&auml;in. Kumiankka ei ole mik&auml;&auml;n k&auml;nnikala!-->
<LI>Unfortunately, rubber ducks are not made out of rubber, but plastics is a good substitute, if it is soft and regains its shape after deformation the way rubber does. A rubber duck should never have dents on its body; it should always have a perfect shape. <!--Valitettavasti kumiankkoja ei tehd&auml; kumista.
 Mutta muovi on kelvollinen materiaali, varsinkin jos se on kumin henkeen
 pehme&auml; ja joustava: ankka ei saa menn&auml; lommolle, vaan sen tulee
 pysy&auml; muodossaan.-->
<LI>A rubber duck may squeak. But it is not a required feature, only optional. A quiet duck is just as good, except if the sound is an onomatopoetic <I>Quack!</I>. A duck like this is superior. <!--Kumiankka saa vinkua. Mutta &auml;&auml;nisignaali
 ei ole pakollinen varuste, vaan lis&auml;optio. Hiljainen ankka on t&auml;sm&auml;lleen
 yht&auml; hyv&auml;, paitsi jos se sanoo onomatopoeettisesti Quack! Sellainen
 ankka on ylivoimainen.--></LI></UL>
<P>As rubberduck mannequin the rubber duck from <A href="http://kumiankka.cs.tut.fi/">kumiankka.cs.tut.fi</A> by Panze <!--Kumiankkamannekiinin&auml; on Panzen Kumiankka-internetserverin
 ankka.--><BR>&nbsp; 
<P><A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#Rubberduck-frontpage"><IMG height=31 src="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/back.gif" width=58 border=0></A> <BR>&nbsp; 
<P>
<DIV>
<HR width="100%">
</DIV>
<DIV><BR><A name=Manual></A><BR>&nbsp; Needless to say, a rubber duck should be used and treated properly. If not, it will caw in a sad manner, and will not greet with a happy "Quack!" those who come into the bathroom. Make sure your rubber duck stays happy by doing the following: <!--Kumiankkaa tulee tietenkin k&auml;ytt&auml;&auml; oikein. Muuten se vaakkuu onnettomana, eik&auml;
 sano terhakkaasti "Quack!" vaan surullisen "kvaaak" kun astut pesuhuoneeseen.
 Varmista kumiankkasi onnellisuus seuraavasti:--></DIV>
<DIR>
<UL type=DISC>
<LI><B>Prime Directive: Take your rubber duck to the bath with you at least once a month</B>. For a rubber duck a bath with its master/mistress is heavenly and the reason to live. <!--Prime Directive: Ota kumiankka mukaan suihkuun
 v&auml;hint&auml;&auml;n kerran kuussa</B>. Kumiankalle on taivaallista
 p&auml;&auml;st&auml; mukaan kylpyyn: se on kumiankan el&auml;m&auml;n
 t&auml;yttymys.-->
<LI>Habitat: The bathroom. Preferably on the bathtub, but other spots in the bathroom will do. A duck detests sudden changes in its potential energy. So do place the duck in a place where it is safe from falling down to the floor. Don't put the duck in a place which is close to a heat-source (a hot light-bulb, for example) to avoid nasty disfiguration. This will most certainly make it furious. <!--Habitat: lis&auml;&auml; Oma pesuvati  (jossa on aina riitt&auml;v&auml;n puhdasta vett&auml; miss&auml; uida
 ja kellua) on kumiankalle luksusasunto. -->
<LI>What ever you do, don't allow your rubber duck to become dusty! Play with it. If you don't know how to do that, let someone else play with it. <!--Mit&auml; vain teetkin, &auml;l&auml; anna kumiankkasi
 p&ouml;lyynty&auml;! Leiki sen kanssa, tai anna jonkun toisen leikki&auml;,
 jos et itse osaa.-->
<LI>A rubber duck enjoys company. Buy more rubber ducks, but other bath toys will do, too. The favourite sport of the rubber duck is synchronized floating :-) <!--Kumiankka tykk&auml;&auml; seurasta. Hanki lis&auml;&auml;
 kumiankkoja, my&ouml;s muut kylpylelut kelpaavat ankan seuraksi. Kumiankkojen
 mieliurheilulaji on kuviokellunta :-)--></LI></UL></DIR>
<DIR>
<UL type=DISC>&nbsp; 
<P><A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#Rubberduck-frontpage"><IMG height=31 src="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/back.gif" width=60 border=0></A> <BR>&nbsp; <BR>&nbsp;</P></UL></DIR>
<DIV>
<HR width="100%">
</DIV>
<OL><A name=History></A><BR>&nbsp; <BR>&nbsp; 
<OL>I had a yellow rubber duck when I was a kid. According to my mother it is tucked away in a box somewhere. I want to find that duck and bring it back to its natural habitat, that is my bathroom. <BR>So all you Freudians, you were right!:-D <!--Minulla oli pienen&auml; keltainen kumiankka.
 Se on &auml;idin mukaan viel&auml; jossain tallella. P&auml;&auml;m&auml;&auml;r&auml;n&auml;ni
 on l&ouml;yt&auml;&auml; se, ja tuoda oikeaan habitattiin: omaan kylpyhuoneeseeni. 
 <BR> Joten kaikki Freudistit, t&auml;ss&auml;kin
 on syyp&auml;&auml;n&auml; lapsuusajan kokemukset!-->
<P><A name="Back to History"></A>At a later stage in my life, as a student when I finally began to allow myself to be a bit off the beaten track and weird and actually enjoy it :-), my fondness of rubber ducks re-emerged. 
<P>I kept on looking for rubberducks in the stores but found none until I finally found one. It was not in accordance with the standard, but it had to do until I found the Real Thing, which I finally did and I was overjoyed. I now have four rubber ducks in my bathroom. <!--Jossain my&ouml;hemm&auml;ss&auml; el&auml;m&auml;nvaiheessa (TTKK:lla, kun uskalsin
 vihdoinkin tunnustaa itselleni, ett&auml; m&auml; olen pime&auml; ihminen
 ja aloin iloitsemaan siit&auml;:-) kumiankat alkoivat taas kiehtomaan minua.
 Etsin etsimist&auml;ni kumiankkoja kaupoista (oletin, ett&auml; Tampere
 on niin iso paikka, ett&auml; ei ole ongelmia l&ouml;yt&auml;&auml; ankka,
 v&auml;&auml;r&auml;ss&auml; olin:( ) ja vihdoin l&ouml;ysin yhden, joka
 ei ollut oikein standardinmukainen. Mutta se kelpasi korvikkeeksi. Onneni
 oli t&auml;ydellinen, kun vihdoinkin l&ouml;ysin standardin mukaisen ankkaparven.
 N&auml;m&auml; nelj&auml; ankkaa komeilevat nyt pesuhuoneessani.-->
<P>Friends moved and moved together and had housewarming parties. As a rubberduckist I wanted to give them rubberducks, because they had everything else that is needed in a household (=they had been on their own for long enough to accumulate a whole set of household essentials (except for the bathroom;-) and non-essentials). I gather the original meaning of housewarming presents was to help the person(s) to equip their home. <BR>My strange passion has stirred up a fair amount of amusement among my friends, and they have been delighted to receive a rubber duck. This way I want to spare <A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#Ducked">them</A> from the rubber duck trauma, which became so familiar to me before I obtained a rubberduck. Whatever the case, at least this is an original and funny present. <!--Kavereilla oli tupiksia ja yhteenmuuttamisia.
Kumiankistina halusin antaa kumiankan, kaikkea muutahan ihmisill&auml;
yleens&auml; jo on (=ovat muuttaneet kotoa jo kauan sitten, joten ovat
jo t&auml;ysin varusteltuja, paitsi kylpyhuoneen osalta;-) ja tuparilahjojen
tarkoitus alunperin oli kai varustaa kotia. 
<BR> Kumiankkapinttym&auml;ni on her&auml;tt&auml;nyt
sen verran hilpeytt&auml; tuttava- ja kaveripiiriss&auml;ni, ett&auml;
ovat olleet iloisia saadessaan oman, standardinmukaisen kumiankan. T&auml;ll&auml;
tavoin haluan s&auml;&auml;st&auml;&auml; <A HREF="#Ducked">heit&auml;</A>
kumiankkatraumalta, joka vainosi minua kunnes sain kumiankan. Sit&auml;paitsi
se on ainakin erilainen ja ep&auml;tyls&auml; tuparilahja. --><!--**************************************************************
*****************************************************************--><BR>&nbsp; <BR><A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#Rubberduck-frontpage"><IMG height=31 src="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/back.gif" width=61 border=0></A></P></OL></OL>
<DIV>
<HR width="100%">
</DIV>
<DIV><BR>&nbsp;<A name=Ducklinks></A> <BR>&nbsp; <BR>&nbsp; </DIV>
<UL>&nbsp;<IMG height=40 src="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/surf.gif" width=560 align=absBottom></UL>
<DIV>&nbsp; </DIV>
<UL>
<UL>
<H2>&nbsp;&nbsp; Links featuring rubber ducks: </H2><A href="http://kumiankka.cs.tut.fi/">Kumiankka (Rubberduck), Panze's internet-server (in Finnish)</A> <BR><A href="http://www.cs.tut.fi/~leopold/Babylon5/Kumiankkaprojekti.html">The Rubberduckproject (in Finnish?)</A>, or convincing the Finnish broadcasting companies to air Babylon 5 <BR><A href="http://www.cs.tut.fi/~leopold/Babylon5/Kumiankka/">Leopold's B5-ducks (stuff in English, too)</A>. <BR><A href="http://www.hut.fi/~shaavist/b5/huumoria.html">Duck humour from Babylon 5 (stuff in English)</A>. Contains duckless humour (in Finnish) as well. <BR><A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#Ankka-viitteet">References to ducks on B5</A> </UL></UL>
<DIV>&nbsp; </DIV>
<OL>
<OL><A href="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/duckpage.htm#Rubberduck-frontpage"><IMG height=31 src="http://www.students.tut.fi/~cami/Quack/back.gif" width=57 align=ABSCENTER border=0></A></OL></OL></FONT><p><br><hr size=1>
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