Re: Having kids makes you unhappy

On Jul 7, 2010, at 11:54 AM, Dan Minette wrote:

> On Jul 7, 2010, at 9:41 AM, William T Goodall wrote:
>
>>> I'm glad I don't have any.
>>
>> Probably best you don't have any for your and for any children's  
>> sake,
>> then, eh?
>>
>> Evidently, there's more to life than pleasing yourself.
>
> You know I'd agree with you, but after reading William for greater  
> than a
> decade, I have come to the tentative conclusions that he believes that
> pleasing himself is all that is important to him.  This includes, of  
> course,
> pleasing others as part of one's own long term interest.
>
> It appears that the research suggests something profound, which I  
> think you
> allude to.  Parenting is for folks who have goals other than their own
> pleasure, who are truly willing to put the needs of others above  
> personal
> pleasure.

As it turns out, I wasn't really pointing the finger (of that last
sentence, anyway) at William, but, as you notice, at the fact that
there's something behind these numbers that suggests that parenting
operates differently from the pursuit of "pleasurable activities".

Also as it turns out, I have known that I wanted to be a father
from the time I was about 12 or 13, and even with the death of my
first son, it is still the best thing I've ever done.

And hellz yeah, I could think of plenty more "pleasurable activities"
than parenting, but I wouldn't trade 'em for being a dad.

Dave