Re: Having kids makes some people fulfilled

On Jul 8, 2010, at 6:03 AM, Jim Sharkey wrote:

> On thing the article doesn't seem touch on, particularly in light of  
> how it indicates single parents are worse off, is how much children  
> can be a source of friction in their parents' relationship.  It can  
> be hard to be on the same page vis a vis the rules and regulations  
> of your household at all times, and *that* can create some  
> unforeseen problems, IMO.  For example, I wish I'd had a camera to  
> take a picture of my wife's face when my aforementioned eldest asked  
> if she could get her hair dyed purple and I said "I don't see why  
> not."  I believe in picking my battles.  :-)
>

The article addressed it, though maybe not in as much depth as other  
aspects of the harder side of parenting:

     This is the brutal reality about children—they’re such powerful
     stressors that small perforations in relationships can turn into
     deep fault lines. "And my wife became more demanding," he
     continues. "'You don’t do this, you don’t do that.' There was
     this idea we had about how things were supposed to be: The
     family should be dot dot dot, the man should be dot dot dot the
     woman should be dot dot dot."

The money quote of the whole article for me:

     "They’re a huge source of joy, but they turn every other source
     of joy to shit."

It's not so much that I agree with it, but it's so plainly put.

Dave