Re: draft-ietf-adslmib-gshdslbis-05 last call

"Clay Sikes" <[email protected]>
Newsgroups gmane.ietf.adslmib
Message-ID <[email protected]>
Hi Bert,

Excellent comments! I also really appreciate the detail on what to 
change things to. I look forward to making the changes and putting out 
version -06.

I do have one question on the last item which is the RFC 3514 reference. 
I couldn't find a reference to 3514 in the draft. Do you mean RFC 3414? 
If so, I have RFC 3414 cited as a Normative Reference because I'm 
calling it out in the Security Considerations section. Please let me 
know if I need to make an adjustment.

Again, thanks for looking over the draft.

- Clay


Wijnen, Bert (Bert) wrote:

>My own review:
>
>- It is probably better to change (in abstract):
>                                                            The MIB
>   module described in this document will obsolete the MIB module
>   described in RFC 3276.
>
>  into:
>                                                            This
>   document obsoletes RFC 3276.
>
>- The current IANA considerations section is from RFC3276:
>
>   3.2  IANA Considerations
>
>   The HDSL2-SHDSL-LINE-MIB module requires the allocation of a single
>   object identifier for its MODULE-IDENTITY.  The IANA has allocated
>   this object identifier in the transmission subtree (48), defined in
>   the SNMPv2-SMI MIB module.
>
>  It might wise to add a paragraph aka:
>
>   The assignment was in fact done when RFC3276 was published, and this
>   revision of the RFC does not require any new action from IANA.
>
>- I see in MODULE REVISION clause (the one for this revision):
>
>   REVISION    "200409100000Z" -- September 10, 2004
>   DESCRIPTION "Initial version, published as RFC xxxx.
>         The following changes have been made from RFC 3276:
>
>  That may be confusing since the "initial" version was in fact published
>  as RFC3276. Maybe better to change "initial" into "This".
>  I would also (but that is personal taste) rephrase that
>  2nd sentence. So maybe better:
>
>   REVISION    "200409100000Z" -- September 10, 2004
>   DESCRIPTION "This version, published as RFC xxxx.
>         The following changes have been made since RFC 3276:  
>
>  or:
>
>   REVISION    "200409100000Z" -- September 10, 2004
>   DESCRIPTION "This version, published as RFC xxxx.
>         The following changes have been made in this version:  
>
>- These days, the MODULE-IDENTITY DESCRIPTION clause must include
>  a copyright statement. So change
>
>   DESCRIPTION
>        "This MIB module defines a collection of objects for managing
>         HDSL2/SHDSL lines.  An agent may reside at either end of the
>         line, however the MIB is designed to require no management
>         communication between the modems beyond that inherent in the
>         low-level EOC line protocol as defined in ANSI T1E1.4/2000-006
>         (for HDSL2 lines), or in ITU G.991.2 (for SHDSL lines)."
>
>  into
>
>   DESCRIPTION
>        "This MIB module defines a collection of objects for managing
>         HDSL2/SHDSL lines.  An agent may reside at either end of the
>         line, however the MIB is designed to require no management
>         communication between the modems beyond that inherent in the
>         low-level EOC line protocol as defined in ANSI T1E1.4/2000-006
>         (for HDSL2 lines), or in ITU G.991.2 (for SHDSL lines).
>
>         Copyright (C) The Internet Society (2004).  This version of
>         this MIB module is part of RFC xxxx; see the RFC itself for
>         full legal notices.
>        "
>
>- I do not understand why RFC3514 is normative reference while RFC3515 is
>  an informative reference. I would expect them to be of the same level.
>
>For now I am assuming that Randy did check all the changes related to
>the previous version of this MIB module.
>
>Bert
>  
>
>>-----Original Message-----
>>From: Michael Sneed [mailto:[email protected]]
>>Sent: Thursday, September 23, 2004 21:11
>>To: [email protected]
>>Subject: [Adslmib] draft-ietf-adslmib-gshdslbis-05 last call
>>
>>
>>Thanks, Clay, for all of your work.
>>
>>If anyone has any further issues with this draft, please 
>>voice them ASAP.  
>>If nothing is posted prior to 22:00Z Thur. next week we will 
>>conclude the WG 
>>Last Call and refer the document for publication.
>>
>>Regards,
>>
>>Mike
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>    
>>
>>>From: "Clay Sikes" <[email protected]>
>>>To: adslmib mail list <[email protected]>
>>>Subject: [Adslmib] draft-ietf-adslmib-gshdslbis-05
>>>Date: Thu, 23 Sep 2004 13:46:29 -0400
>>>
>>>All,
>>>
>>>The current version of the "Definitions of Managed Objects 
>>>      
>>>
>>for G.shdsl.bis 
>>    
>>
>>>Lines" draft is -05. Please accept my apology for not 
>>>      
>>>
>>keeping this list up 
>>    
>>
>>>to date on the changes. This message should outline the 
>>>      
>>>
>>changes made to the 
>>    
>>
>>>draft, since the -02 version.
>>>
>>>On August 20, 2004, Mike Sneed, the adslmib Chair, issued a 
>>>      
>>>
>>Last Call on 
>>    
>>
>>>version -02 of the draft.
>>>
>>>On August 24, 2004, Randy Presuhn, sent two messages 
>>>      
>>>
>>containing a list of 
>>    
>>
>>>comments and issues with version -02. Let me say that I am extremely 
>>>grateful to Randy for the time he put in the review. His review was 
>>>extremely detailed and generated an awesome list of 
>>>      
>>>
>>comments. His messages 
>>    
>>
>>>containing the comments can be found on the ADSL MIB 
>>>      
>>>
>>Discussion Archive. 
>>    
>>
>>>The changes from version -02 to version -03 address each 
>>>      
>>>
>>comment Randy had. 
>>    
>>
>>>Below is an outline of the significant changes:
>>>1. The tool I used to generate a draft was updated which 
>>>      
>>>
>>resulted in some 
>>    
>>
>>>boiler plate and white space changes.
>>>2 Changes to the HDSL2-SHDSL-LINE-MIB portion were as follows:
>>>2a.. LAST-UPDATED was updated.
>>>2b. WG-URL was added.
>>>2c. REVISION list was collapsed and updated.
>>>2d. Added explicit bounds to objects pertaining to Rates. 
>>>      
>>>
>>The explicit 
>>    
>>
>>>bound matches Unsigned32 in SMIv2.
>>>2e. Added REFERENCEs to the objects in the hdsl2ShdslInventoryTable.
>>>2f. Added  hdsl2ShdslPayloadRateGroup.
>>>2g. Removed hdsl2ShdslStatusMaxAttainablePayloadRate and 
>>>hdsl2ShdslStatusActualPayloadRate from the 
>>>      
>>>
>>hdsl2ShdslSpanStatusGroup and 
>>    
>>
>>>add them to the hdsl2ShdslPayloadRateGroup.
>>>2h. Changed the hdsl2ShdslCurrShdslGroup to hdsl2ShdslWirePairGroup.
>>>
>>>I messed up the process of submitting version -03 with 
>>>      
>>>
>>respect to saying 
>>    
>>
>>>what version it was and having that match what was in the 
>>>      
>>>
>>draft, so I 
>>    
>>
>>>submitted version -04. In version -04, the LAST-UPDATED and 
>>>      
>>>
>>REVISION were 
>>    
>>
>>>updated. Even when I submitted version -04 to the IETF, I 
>>>      
>>>
>>had everything in 
>>    
>>
>>>the draft correct, but I stated in my email it was -03. I 
>>>      
>>>
>>guess I'm just a 
>>    
>>
>>>slow-learning, stupid newbie. Fortunately, the IETF didn't 
>>>      
>>>
>>post what said, 
>>    
>>
>>>but posted what was in the draft, so it worked out. God 
>>>      
>>>
>>bless the IETF!
>>    
>>
>>>On September 2, 2004, Randy Presuhn, commented that I had 
>>>      
>>>
>>some dangling 
>>    
>>
>>>references after the last round of edits. As a result, 
>>>      
>>>
>>version -05 was 
>>    
>>
>>>submitted with the following changes:
>>>1. LAST-UPDATED was updated.
>>>2. REVISION was updated. Remember the REVISIONs are 
>>>      
>>>
>>collapsed since the 
>>    
>>
>>>draft is that close to being an RFC.
>>>3. The following dangling references were removed:
>>>3a. RFC 1155
>>>3b. RFC 1157
>>>3c. RFC 1212
>>>3d. RFC 1215
>>>3e. RFC 1901
>>>3f. RFC 3412
>>>3g. RFC 3413
>>>3h. RFC 3416
>>>3i. RFC 3417
>>>3j. T1.213-2001
>>>
>>>This should bring us up to the -05 version of the draft. I didn't go 
>>>through the details of each change. Instead, I highlighted 
>>>      
>>>
>>the "major" 
>>    
>>
>>>ones. In anyone needs to look at any of the versions, please 
>>>      
>>>
>>let me know 
>>    
>>
>>>and I would be happy to send them to you.
>>>
>>>Again, sorry I haven't been updating the list. As a newbie, 
>>>      
>>>
>>I wasn't sure 
>>    
>>
>>>if I should, but since have learned that it's necessary.
>>>
>>>Regards,
>>>Clay Sikes
>>>
>>>
>>>
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>>>
>>>
>>>_______________________________________________
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>>>[email protected]
>>>https://www1.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/adslmib
>>>      
>>>
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>>
>
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