Re: draft-tan-epp-launchphase-04
Bernhard Reutner-Fischer <[email protected]>
| Newsgroups | gmane.ietf.provreg |
|---|---|
| Message-ID | <[email protected]> |
Hi, I am attaching a diff against draft-tan-epp-launchphase-04 from skimming over the draft (against the .txt, i did not find TeX source or the like). I am with James Gould that using dateTime feels more comfortable than plain date since EPP generally uses the former. Since in EPP the XML frames are entitled "commands" rather than frames, i suggest to change all "Frame" occurances to "Command" in the section headers (e.g. "Claims Create Form" -> "Claims Create Command") as well as in the document body. I can provide a follow-up patch unless you prefer to change that yourself. Changes - 2.3. Status Values: The server SHOULD NOT use of the "custom" status value. either "make use of" or "use the". I did choose the latter. For example, an application MAY immediately start at the allocated status or an application MAY skip the pendingAuction status if server does not support an auction. If a <domain:create> missing "the" in "if server" s attribute enumeration: Capitalize description phrases - 2.5. Mark <mark:label>: Zero or more domain name labels that corresponds to Shouldn't that be "that correspond" without the s? What is the difference between <mark:type> and <mark:entitlement>? The description looks like it was just copy'n pasted? I take it that <mark:country> can be specified Zero or more times? Also capitalize the phrases in the element enumeration. - 2.6. Contact Likewise What is the rationale behind using "smd" for the namespace of "Signed Mark" and not the more intuitive "sm" (especially since using a namespace-prefix is recommended anyway)? - 2.7.1. <smd:signedMark> element <smd:serial>: Signature serial number that that can too many "that" <smd:exDate>: OPTIONAL date and time that the <smd:signedMark> expires. of the ... expiry - 2.7.2. <smd:encodedSignedMark> element The following is an example an <smd:encodedSignedMark> element missing "of" - 3.1. EPP <check> Command The value of that the <launch:claimKey> element can be used surplus "the" - 3.2. EPP <info> Command I would leave out the second example (with the optional applicationID omitted). launch:infData enumeration: Capitalize description phrases - 3.3. EPP <create> Command sunrise The EPP <create> command ... is used to submit an registration a - 3.3.1. Sunrise Create Form launch:create enumeration: Capitalize description phrases resData enumeration: Capitalize description phrases There is a mixture of "xmlns:launch="urn:ietf:params:xml:ns:launch-1.0" and <launch:creData xmlns:lp="urn:ietf:params:xml:ns:launchphase-1.0"> in the last example. Using the former uniformly. - 3.3.2. Claims Create Form This extension does not define any extension to the response of an typo: s/an/a/ defined in the EPP domain mapping. missing cross-reference to rfc5731. - 3.4. EPP <update> Command A server that does not support allow multiple applications support or allow? Picking the former. domain name with a Application Identifier an along with an <launch: a launch:update enumeration: Capitalize description phrases as defined in the EPP domain mapping missing cross-reference to rfc5731. - 3.5. EPP <delete> Command domain name with a Application Identifier an submitting an EPP <delete> command along with an <launch:delete> a This extension does not define any extension to the response of an a as defined in the EPP domain mapping missing cross-reference to rfc5731. The example reponse has the wrong clTRID, i suspect this is wrong in other places, too. - 3.7. EPP <transfer> Command as defined in the EPP domain mapping missing cross-reference to rfc5731. - 4.1. Launch Schema Why is idContainerType->applicationID of type token and not applicationIDType ? - 4.2. Signed Mark Schema Is the signedMarkType->id really necessary? - 4.3. Mark Schema type="date" as mentioned above it would be nice to have those as dateTime mark:ccType could be just a ref contact:ccType Same for pcType, addrType, email and the phone numbers and extensions. thanks, Bernhard _______________________________________________ provreg mailing list [email protected] https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/provreg
draft-tan-epp-launchphase-04.01.txt
(text/plain, 14.8 KB)
--- draft-tan-epp-launchphase-04.txt.orig 2012-12-04 14:03:39.000000000 +0100
+++ draft-tan-epp-launchphase-04.txt 2012-12-11 11:00:45.451411732 +0100
@@ -250,15 +250,15 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
The following status values are defined using the required "s"
attribute:
- pending: the initial state of a newly-created application object.
- validated: the application meets relevant registry rules.
- invalid: the application does not validate according to registry
+ pending: The initial state of a newly-created application object.
+ validated: The application meets relevant registry rules.
+ invalid: The application does not validate according to registry
rules.
- pendingAuction: the application is pending based on results of an
+ pendingAuction: The application is pending based on results of an
auction.
- allocated: one of two possible end states of an application object;
+ allocated: One of two possible end states of an application object;
the object corresponding to the application has been provisioned.
- rejected: the other possible end state; the object was not
+ rejected: The other possible end state; the object was not
provisioned.
custom: A custom status that is defined using the "name" attribute.
@@ -271,7 +271,7 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
For extensibility the <launch:status> element includes an OPTIONAL
"name" attribute that can define a sub-status or the full name of the
status when the status value is "custom". The server SHOULD NOT use
- of the "custom" status value.
+ the "custom" status value.
@@ -285,9 +285,9 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
can be invalid and rejected. Additionally certain statuses MAY be
skipped. For example, an application MAY immediately start at the
allocated status or an application MAY skip the pendingAuction status
- if server does not support an auction. If a <domain:create>
+ if the server does not support an auction. If a <domain:create>
processes a request synchronously without the use of an intermediate
- application, than an Application Identifier (Section 2.1) is not
+ application, then an Application Identifier (Section 2.1) is not
needed along with the application status.
2.3.1. State Transition
@@ -449,29 +449,29 @@ Tan, et al. Expires June 7
Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mapping for EPP December 2012
- <mark:id>: an identifier for the mark. This identifier MUST be
+ <mark:id>: An identifier for the mark. This identifier MUST be
unique among all marks associated with an application object.
<mark:name>: The registered trademark text string. This value is
free-form text that MAY be mapped to one or more <mark:label>
values.
- <mark:label>: Zero or more domain name labels that corresponds to
+ <mark:label>: Zero or more domain name labels that correspond to
the <mark:name>. Each <mark:label> can match directly to the
domain name after adding the parent zone.
- <mark:issuer>: name of the authority which issued the right
+ <mark:issuer>: Name of the authority which issued the right
(trademark clearinghouse, trademark office, company registration
bureau, etc.)
- <mark:number>: the registration number of the right (trademark
+ <mark:number>: The registration number of the right (trademark
number, company registration number, etc.)
- <mark:type>: indicates the applicant's entitlement to the mark
+ <mark:type>: Indicates the applicant's entitlement to the mark
(owner, licensee, etc.)
- <mark:class>: zero or more Nice Classification class numbers as
+ <mark:class>: Zero or more Nice Classification class numbers as
defined in the Nice List of Classes [2]
- <mark:entitlement>: indicates the applicant's entitlement to the
+ <mark:entitlement>: Indicates the applicant's entitlement to the
mark (owner, licensee, etc.)
- <mark:regDate>: the date of registration / application of the mark
- <mark:effectiveDate>: the date the mark becomes effective
- <mark:exDate>: the date of expiration of the mark
- <mark:country>: indicates the country in which the mark is valid.
+ <mark:regDate>: The date of registration / application of the mark
+ <mark:effectiveDate>: The date the mark becomes effective
+ <mark:exDate>: The date of expiration of the mark
+ <mark:country>: Indicates the country in which the mark is valid.
This may be a two-character code from [WIPO.ST3]
<mark:region>: indicates the name of a city, state, province or
other geographic region in which the mark is valid.
@@ -505,21 +505,21 @@ Tan, et al. Expires June 7
Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mapping for EPP December 2012
- <mark:name>: name of the individual or role represented by the
+ <mark:name>: Name of the individual or role represented by the
contact.
- <mark:org>: name of the organization with which the contact is
+ <mark:org>: Name of the organization with which the contact is
affiliated.
- <mark:addr>: address information associated with the contact. the
- <mark:addr> element contains the following child elements:
+ <mark:addr>: Address information associated with the contact. the
+ <mark:addr> Element contains the following child elements:
- <mark:street> zero to three <mark:street> elements that contain
+ <mark:street> Zero to three <mark:street> elements that contain
the contact's street address.
- <mark:city> contact's city
- <mark:sp> contact's state or province
- <mark:cc> contact's country code
- <mark:voice>: contact's voice telephone number
- <mark:fax>: contact's facsimile telephone number
- <mark:email>: contact's email address
+ <mark:city> Contact's city
+ <mark:sp> Contact's state or province
+ <mark:cc> Contact's country code
+ <mark:voice>: Contact's voice telephone number
+ <mark:fax>: Contact's facsimile telephone number
+ <mark:email>: Contact's email address
All of the child elements are OPTIONAL. Server policy may place
additional constraints on the format and requirements of such
@@ -561,10 +561,10 @@ Tan, et al. Expires June 7
Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mapping for EPP December 2012
- <smd:serial>: Signature serial number that that can be compared with
+ <smd:serial>: Signature serial number that can be compared with
a revocation list by the server.
- <smd:exDate>: OPTIONAL date and time that the <smd:signedMark>
- expires. The server MUST NOT accept a <smd:signedMark> that has
+ <smd:exDate>: OPTIONAL date and time of the <smd:signedMark>
+ expiry. The server MUST NOT accept a <smd:signedMark> that has
expired. No <smd:exDate> element indicates that there is no
expiry.
<mark:mark>: Trademark information as defined in the Mark
@@ -673,7 +673,7 @@ Tan, et al. Expires June 7
Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mapping for EPP December 2012
- The following is an example an <smd:encodedSignedMark> element that
+ The following is an example of an <smd:encodedSignedMark> element that
uses the default "base64" for encoding a <smd:signedMark> element.
<smd:encodedSignedMark
@@ -763,7 +763,7 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
is available the Claims Check Command will return whether or not at
least one matching trademark exists for the domain name. If there is
at least one matching trademark that exists for the domain name a
- <launch:claimKey> element is returned. The value of that the
+ <launch:claimKey> element is returned. The value of that
<launch:claimKey> element can be used with an info service of a third
party trademark provider like the Trademark Clearinghouse (TMCH) for
getting the information needed to generate the trademark claims
@@ -1091,14 +1091,14 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
infData> element along with the regular EPP <resData>. The <launch:
infData> contains the following child elements:
- <launch:phase> the phase during which the application was submitted
+ <launch:phase> The phase during which the application was submitted
or is associated with that matches the associated <info> command
<launch:phase>.
<launch:applicationID> OPTIONAL application identifier of the launch
application.
<launch:status> OPTIONAL status of the launch application using one
of the supported status values (Section 2.3).
- <mark:mark> zero or more <mark:mark> elements. The <mark:mark>
+ <mark:mark> Zero or more <mark:mark> elements. The <mark:mark>
child elements are defined in the <mark:mark> element
(Section 2.5) section.
@@ -1198,7 +1198,7 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
below:
sunrise The EPP <create> command with the "sunrise" launch phase is
- used to submit an registration with trademark information that can
+ used to submit a registration with trademark information that can
be verified by the server with the <domain:name> value. The
Sunrise Create Form (Section 3.3.1) is used for the "sunrise"
launch phase. Optionally, the server can support multiple
@@ -1244,13 +1244,13 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
<launch:phase> The launch phase for the create like the "sunrise"
launch phase.
<launch:codeMark> or <smd:signedMark> or <smd:encodedSignedMark>
- <launch:codeMark> zero or more <launch:codeMark> elements. The
+ <launch:codeMark> Zero or more <launch:codeMark> elements. The
<launch:codeMark> child elements are defined in the <launch:
codeMark> element (Section 2.4.1) section.
- <smd:signedMark> zero or more <smd:signedMark> elements. The
+ <smd:signedMark> Zero or more <smd:signedMark> elements. The
<smd:signedMark> child elements are defined in the <smd:
signedMark> element (Section 2.7.1) section.
- <smd:encodedSignedMark> zero or more <smd:encodedSignedMark>
+ <smd:encodedSignedMark> Zero or more <smd:encodedSignedMark>
elements. The <smd:encodedSignedMark> child elements are
defined in the <smd:encodedSignedMark> element
(Section 2.7.2) section.
@@ -1683,7 +1683,7 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
<launch:phase> The phase of the application that mirrors the
<launch:phase> element included in the <launch:create>.
- <launch:applicationID> the application identifier of the
+ <launch:applicationID> The application identifier of the
application.
An example response when multiple overlapping applications are
@@ -1704,7 +1704,7 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
</domain:creData>
</resData>
<extension>
- <launch:creData xmlns:lp="urn:ietf:params:xml:ns:launchphase-1.0">
+ <launch:creData xmlns:launch="urn:ietf:params:xml:ns:launch-1.0">
<launch:phase>sunrise</launch:phase>
<launch:applicationID>2393-9323-E08C-03B1</launch:applicationID>
</launch:creData>
@@ -1783,7 +1783,7 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
</command>
</epp>
- This extension does not define any extension to the response of an
+ This extension does not define any extension to the response of a
<create> domain command for the Claims Create Form. After processing
@@ -1794,31 +1794,31 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
the command, the server replies with a standard EPP response as
- defined in the EPP domain mapping.
+ defined in the EPP domain mapping [RFC5731].
3.4. EPP <update> Command
This extension defines additional elements to extend the EPP <update>
command to be used in conjunction with the domain name mapping.
- A server that does not support allow multiple applications of a given
- domain name with a Application Identifier (Section 2.1) during its
+ A server that does not support multiple applications of a given
+ domain name with an Application Identifier (Section 2.1) during its
launch phase operations MUST return an EPP error result code of 2102.
Registry policies permitting, clients may update an application
- object by submitting an EPP <update> command along with an <launch:
+ object by submitting an EPP <update> command along with a <launch:
update> element to indicate the application object to be updated.
The <launch:update> element contains the following child elements:
- <launch:phase> the phase during which the application was submitted
+ <launch:phase> The phase during which the application was submitted
or is associated with.
- <launch:applicationID> the application identifier for which the
+ <launch:applicationID> The application identifier for which the
client wishes to update.
This extension does not define any extension to the response of an
<update> domain command. After processing the command, the server
replies with a standard EPP response as defined in the EPP domain
- mapping.
+ mapping [RFC5731].
@@ -1926,23 +1926,23 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
command to be used in conjunction with the domain name mapping.
A server that does not support multiple applications of a given
- domain name with a Application Identifier (Section 2.1) during its
+ domain name with an Application Identifier (Section 2.1) during its
launch phase operations MUST return an EPP error result code of 2102.
Registry policies permitting, clients MAY withdraw an application by
- submitting an EPP <delete> command along with an <launch:delete>
+ submitting an EPP <delete> command along with a <launch:delete>
element to indicate the application object to be deleted. The
<launch:delete> element contains the following child elements:
- <launch:phase> the phase during which the application was submitted
+ <launch:phase> The phase during which the application was submitted
or is associated with.
- <launch:applicationID> the application identifier for which the
+ <launch:applicationID> The application identifier for which the
client wishes to delete.
- This extension does not define any extension to the response of an
+ This extension does not define any extension to the response of a
<delete> domain command. After processing the command, the server
replies with a standard EPP response as defined in the EPP domain
- mapping.
+ mapping [RFC5731].
@@ -2009,6 +2009,7 @@ Internet-Draft Launch Phase Mappi
This extension does not define any extension to the EPP <transfer>
command or response described in the EPP domain name mapping
+ [RFC5731].