Re: First Bike!

The sales dude said blue was the fastest, so... ::shrug::

Dan


On Mar 8, 2006, at 6:45 PM, Robert Meador wrote:

> On Mar 8, 2006, at 3:12 PM, Myers, Bob (Display Technology) wrote:
>
>>> ...of all the non-silver options. The silver
>>> model, having no actual color pigment, is
>>> .000000000000000014372 grams lighter. Also, being
>>> the lightest color, it absorbs fewer photons (which
>>> are much heavier than most people think - the
>>> typical photon weighs about as much as a month-old
>>> kitten). Finally, since it reflects the most light,
>>> silver is the fastest color when heading east in
>>> the afternoon, or west in the morning. Thus, the
>>> direction of your daily commute is an important
>>> factor when choosing color.
>>
>> Oh, no, no, Grasshopper...and as much as it pains me to have to
>> respectfully point out the error of your ways in the above, I must,
>> sadly, do so.
>>
>> Silver paint, since the silver color in question comes from a
>> suspension
>> of fine particles of metallic substances (generally pure lead, or
>> maybe
>> plutonium or osmium or something even denser) is actually the
>> HEAVIEST
>> of the paints, by a good 3-4 whole milligrams per square cm.
>> Blue, on
>> the other hand, is the lightest; think about what other things are
>> blue
>> - the most obvious example, of course, is the sky, and you don't get
>> much lighter than that. So silver bikes start out at a significant
>> disadvantage relative to their faster, and altogether MUCH
>> nicer-looking, blue brethren.  (I won't even go into the effects that
>> being in the presence of such heavy metals might have on the thought
>> processes of those spending much time on or around said silver-
>> painted
>> vehicles; at this point, y'all probably wouldn't get it anyway...:-))
>>
>> Further, you unfortunately have been misinformed (undoubtedly the
>> effects of an inadequate public-school education) as to the
>> *extremely*
>> significant effects of photonic reflection/absorption; nay, you
>> have it
>> exactly backwards! Photons themselves have very, very little mass,
>> but
>> of course it is well known that photons CAN carry significant
>> momentum,
>> and this is the principle behind such concepts as the "light-sail"
>> spacecraft drive.  But to fully absorb this momentum, you want to -
>> what?  That's right, ABSORB those photons, not reflect them.  Blue
>> paint, since it absorbs most of the visible spectrum (including that
>> nice peak in sunlight around the green) clearly will impart the most
>> photon-carried momentum to the bike.
>
> Ah, so silver is actually better for a west-east morning commute, as
> it will accumulate less negative momentum from the photon impacts. I
> stand corrected. Considering only photonic momentum, both bikes will
> average out to the same speed on the track, with the silver pulling
> ahead eastbound (assuming morning testing) and the blue catching up
> when the track turns west.
>
> You are right about blue absorbing photons, but I'm afraid you've
> been fooled by what passes for "science" as to the mass of photons.
> The lightest photons are similar in mass to a mid-sized hamster,
> while the heaviest ones can mass as much as a very wet baby raccoon.
> I know this because a guy told me once, I think.
>
> Thus, on a particularly sunny day, the mass of a blue bike can
> increase by several hundred pounds. Hey, check it and see, don't
> listen to me!
>
> As far as the metallic paint goes, it's true the silver paint
> contains significant amounts of plutonium - this is one of the
> reasons it's faster, actually - the pain caused by radiation burns
> puts the body's nervous system on high alert, resulting in quicker
> throttle response and faster shifts. Additionally, because of the
> high metallic content of the paint, it's possible to use less metal
> in the manufacture of the bike - possibly as much as 1/2 the amount
> found in blue bikes. The paint actually forms a structural layer.
> It's like wearing a lot of layers when you go camping - everyone
> knows it's a good idea, and so it must be a good idea for bikes too.
> Think about it....camping...outdoors........bikes....ALSO OUTDOORS!
> It's EXACTLY THE SAME!
>
> Therefore, I am right.
>
>
> - the other Bob M.
>
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