What's New Robert L. Park April 30, 2010

WHAT=92S NEW   Robert L. Park   Friday, 30 Apr 10   Washington, DC

1. STEPHEN HAWKING: A BRIEF HISTORY OF CRIME.
They are out there somewhere, and the computer of the world's most famous=
=20
physicist says in a vaguely Norwegian accent that we should keep low so=20
they won't notice we=92re here.  In a new documentary for the Discovery=20
Channel, Hawking says, "To my mathematical brain the numbers alone make=20
thinking about aliens perfectly rational." That depends on what you think=
=20
about them.  He suggests that aliens might raid Earth to take our=20
resources. Actually, our resources are draining away into the Gulf of=20
Mexico. Or maybe the aliens analyzed the Hubbert peak and decided we=20
weren't worth the trouble. "We have only to look at ourselves to see how=20
intelligent life might develop into something we wouldn't want to meet." =
=20
I'm sure the series will be a great commercial success, but this is total=
ly=20
irresponsible. All this paranoid society needs is the world's most famous=
=20
scientist telling us that the obesity epidemic was engineered by the spac=
e=20
aliens to fatten us up for the feast. Not only is Prof. Hawking profiling=
=20
with a totally imaginary profile, he screwed up the mathematical physics.=
=20
Let=92s run the numbers for him:

2. THE TRIP: WE AREN=92T GOING THERE, AND THEY=92RE NOT COMING HERE.
Every September on the first day of class I ask my new freshman physics=20
majors if they think humans will ever travel to another star. Almost all=20
say "sure, eventually." "Okay," I tell them, "let's start planning the=20
trip." We set a few minutes aside in every class session to work on the=20
plan.  How far is it to the nearest star? It=92s 4.2 ly to Proxima Centau=
ri. =20
How long can we take to get there? We agree on a working lifetime, 50=20
years.  Multi-generational space travel would raise ethical concerns.  At=
=20
that velocity we can use Isaac Newton=92s 300-year-old laws of motion. =20
Indeed, until his retirement last year, Stephen Hawking occupied the=20
Lucasian Chair of Mathematics at Cambridge, once held by Newton. Anyway, =
my=20
class couldn=92t agree on how many frozen pizzas we would need on the tri=
p so=20
we settled for calculating the energy per gram, 317 MJ/g.  Can that be=20
right?  If it is we just solved the Fermi paradox. These hideous aliens a=
re=20
lusting for Earth women but don't have enough stuff to make the trip.=20
According to the 2003 movie, 21 Grams, starring Sean Penn and Naomi Watts=
,=20
it's an "established scientific fact" that the human soul weighs 21 g. =20
Maybe it's our souls the aliens are after?=20

3. LUCK: WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO BE A SCIENTIST ANYWAY?
The leading story in the Personal Journal section of the Wall Street=20
Journal yesterday, was the Power of Lucky Charms by Carl Bialik. The=20
subtitle was New Research Suggests How They Really Make Us Perform Better=
.=20
Here's the scene: participants on a putting green who we're told they wer=
e=20
playing with a "Lucky Ball" did 35% better on average.  Psychologists,=20
we=92re told, are exploring ways to tap into people's belief in good luck=
.=20
What I learned from the study is, don't believe what psychologists tell y=
ou.

THE UNIVERSITY OF MARYLAND.
Opinions are the author's and not necessarily shared by the
University of Maryland, but they should be.
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