Re: A.A.P.C. FOLKLORE, Part Twenty-Three

> HarryLime wrote:
> 
>> NancyGene wrote:
>> 
>>> Bruce wrote:
>>> NancyGene wrote:
>>> 
>>>> HarryLime wrote:
>>>> 
>>>> NancyGene wrote:
>>>> 
>>>> Cujo DeSockpuppet wrote:
>>>> [email protected] (NancyGene) wrote in
>>>> news:[email protected]:
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> HarryLime wrote:
>>>> 
>>>> HarryLime wrote:
>>>> 
>>>> HarryLime wrote:
>>>> 
>>>> George J. Dance wrote:
>>>> 
>>>> MMP aka HarryLime aka Michael Pendragon aka Coco DeSockmonkey aka
>>>> One Small Voice, etc. wrote: [snip]
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> DISCLAIMER - "This isn't history, Donkey, but folklore. It's the
>>>> stories that have grown up regarding the members of AAPC over the
>>>> years. They may or may not be entirely true -- THEY MAY NOT EVEN
>>>> BE TRUE AT ALL." (Emphasis added) - MMP aka HarryLime aka Michael
>>>> Pendragon aka Coco DeSockmonkey aka One Small Voice, etc., on his
>>>> "A.A.P.C. Folklore" series.
>>>> http://www.jlaforums.com/viewtopic.php?t=632244559&start=120
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> Dozens of photos of "The Shed" have been posted to A.A.P.C.,
>>>> including some with Will Donkey stepping out of the door.  This
>>>> makes its place in A.A.P.C. folklore entirely based upon fact.
>>>> 
>>>> There are many tales regarding "The Shed," most of which can be
>>>> traced to photographs, public records, or posts made by Will
>>>> Donkey.
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> As can be readily seen in this photo from Google Maps, "The Shed"
>>>> appears to have been deserted.  This gave rise to numerous stories
>>>> about Will Donkey having been through out for not paying his
>>>> property taxes.
>>>> 
>>>> An image of Will sporting numerous cuts and contusions was believed
>>>> to be evidence that he'd been severely beaten by several other
>>>> homeless persons while living on the Columbus streets.
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> Although "The Shed" is said to be deserted, locals have whispered
>>>> stories about how a fat, bloated Donkey is sometimes seen waddling
>>>> across the lawn.
>>>> 
>>>> Among the residents of Columbus, GA, the following photo is akin to
>>>> one of Big Foot or the Loch Ness Monster:
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> And for someone who notoriously never washes his clothes, why is there
>>>> washing hanging on a clothes line across the front door of the shed?
>>>> In the winter.
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> To confuse the flies.
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> --
>>>> "I've known for over a year that this guy is the assassin of the Usenet
>>>> poetry community. When I first arrived, I thought he was keeping the
>>>> lights on in a dead group by reposting from archives. I soon realized
>>>> that he was just endlessly reposting his own stuff, that he had killed
>>>> the group by flooding it, and that most of the people he called
>>>> "trolls" were actually the members of the group.
>>>> I've joined the crowd. I'm done trying to work with him and speak
>>>> reason
>>>> to him. It's exhausting and pointless." - Little Willie Douchebag gets
>>>> another asskicking from The One True Melissa
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> Ah, so!  The flies aren't confused for long, though.  They know where
>>>> it smells the worst, and that is at the shed, in the shed, and around
>>>> the shed.
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> The flies seem to be concentrated around Will's filthy underwear.
>>>> 
>>>> This leads me to conclude that Will's method of washing his clothes is
>>>> to hang them outside and wait for it to rain.  (Apparently the city
>>>> turned of his water several years ago.)
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> Will wears them in the regular way, then inside out, then upside down,
>>>> before finally hanging them outside the door.  Since they are very
>>>> large, the wind inflates them and moves the front porch a foot or so in
>>>> either direction.
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>> 
>>> A pissbum windsock.
>> 
>> 
>> Absolutely!  George Dunce has tried this method several times in Canuckistan, but the underwear always freezes pointing "North."
> 
> 
> I have it on the authority of several Moose that Dunce's undergarments are also not quite what one would expect.



Canuckistoria's Secret!  Dunce also used to order from Frederick's of Hollywood, which catered to its horny Canuckistanian customers.  More holes, more fun.  Edible. 


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