LNH/REPOST: Digital JUMP! #9: "INDIGO! The Melancholy of Kimball Kinnison!"
Drew Nilium <[email protected]> Sat, 14 Dec 2024 04:48:22 -0000 (UTC)
| Newsgroups | rec.arts.comics.creative,alt.comics.lnh |
|---|---|
| Organization | A noiseless patient Spider |
| Message-ID | <[email protected]> |
PREHISTORIC PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS IN ASSOCIATION WITH RULED PAPER NOTEBOOKS AND AN ANNOYING AMOUNT OF FREE TIME ...from the files of the Molybdenum Age... <----------------------> Digital JUMP! Written by Andrew Perron Cover art by, oh, let's say Moe Issue #9 - INDIGO! The Melancholy of Kimball Kinnison! <----------------------> <----------------------> The cover shows Carmine in silhouette, lit from behind by a bright red light in the shape of an @. In the lower-right corner sits an overly- stylized logo proclaiming "Warriors of Light: Part VI!" <----------------------> <----------------------> Last time, on Digital JUMP!: "You're *me* from the *future*." "We took down the Baron and stopped the battle between the Periodic Houses and Erehton - and played right into the Tyrant's hands." "Eventually, we found out that there was a way to counter the power of the Atavists, with a mystic force of equal power. We realized we could go back and get the tools to overthrow the Tyrant... and, at the same time, make sure there was at least *one* world where this didn't happen." "Let the retroactive liberation commence!" "Greetings, ladies and gentlemen, from the one and only, flesh and blood, Baron MacNottherealvillain!" "...shit!" <----------------------> -----------<>----------- The heroes were shackled in irons glimmering with enchantment, their weapons and bags locked away. At spear-point, the Baron grinning with malicious glee, they were marched through the sparkling silver-gray halls towards an opulent room with a throne, garnished in gold and topped by four crystal spheres. Sitting on the throne, opulent as all hell, was a man. A surprisingly young man, in fact. He slumped slightly at a smug, supremely self- assured angle, and though you couldn't see his smirk through the ceremonial mask of House Galvanis (covering his mouth and chin like a burnished brass Shredder), you could see it in his eyes. His armor was hammered into a Herculean six-pack, and a pendant shaped like an @ dangled lazily from his neck. He pushed off the throne and stood, hands clasped behind his back in a parody of parade rest. "Excellent; you're here right on time. Guards, dismiss yourselves; from now on, today is an annual holiday." Murmuring appreciatively, the rank and file shuffled out, leaving them alone with the Tyrant and the Baron. "Well." A sly grin spread to his eyes. "I'll be sure not to take up too much of your time." He snapped his fingers, and a set of triplets hovered into the room; the robot Barons. Along with their human counterpart, all four began to gather energy in their hands, charging up for a killing blow. "Awwww..." Kid Enthusiastic sighed and rolled his eyes. "You seriously mean you're not going to exposit?" The Tyrant chuckled. "Sorry. I've *read* the Evil Overlord List." Kid E shrugged. "Eh, making fun of cliches is overrated. I prefer to use them in new ways." "Oh?" The glow of energy build-up was nearly blinding. "Such as?" "Well, such as getting yourself captured intentionally!" And on the second syllable of "captured", their shackles exploded away, braces bursting out from underneath. By the time "intentionally" was done, the Tyrant was shouting "FIRE!", but the fivesome had already split apart. Carmine pulled a small wafer of glass and circuits from her armor and crushed it. In a flash, her backpack appeared in her hand. She drew her staff, and remembered the briefing they'd gotten before leaving... ~~~~~~~~~~~()~~~~~~~~~~~ "Here ya go!" said Kid Enthusiastic, presenting each of the team with a suitcase. The Faded Iron Master popped his open and demonstrated how to put on the polyceramic bracers. "The Tyrant will be expecting us. He thinks two steps ahead, but he thinks small. If we draw on the resources of the LNH, we have access to technology he can't even imagine, let alone predict." ~~~~~~~~~~~()~~~~~~~~~~~ And there he was, allies both robotic and fleshy drawn away. She grinned and ran at him... -----------<>----------- Kid Enthusiastic rocketskated through the air, zigging and zagging at crazy random angles thanks to the gyroscopic destabilizer in his belt. The cybernetic Baron blasted at him, eyes rolling in his head as he tried to lock on. It was fun, but he was getting dizzy. Time to go on the offensive! "Hey!" he shouted. "Are you the kind of robot that it's okay to just destroy, or are you an individual, with your own feelings and opinions and stuff?" "What!? Fool! I am Baron MacNottherealvillain, that-- really, are you serious?!" "Oh, that's gotta be the second one! MP units don't use interrobangs!" Forget the magnets, then. How about... The rockets cut out, and a pair of sparkly, glittery butterfly wings extended from Kid Enthusiastic's back. The Baron gaped in surprise as pixie dust showered gently over his body... and seized up, struggling to move as the "dust" sought out his joints. Kid E fluttered by, satisfied that Fairy Princess Antipersonnel Mode worked as designed. -----------<>----------- Malachite probed the Baron's structure, dodging bursts of arcane energy. It had been built with only trace amounts of tungsten. Coincidence? Not hardly - there was precious little iron either, all of it wrapped in magnetism-nullifying electromagnetic cages. They wouldn't nullify the Master's magic, but they'd damp it down to near- uselessness. Yes, whoever engineered this body was as sharp as a tack. Hopefully, the mind driving the body was a bit more potatoesque. She curved in flight, the ring Kid E had supplied operating smoothly. The Baron paused in his attack and started chanting softly, motes of blue light appearing in his hands. They zipped off, and as she turned, they turned with her. Tracking stars. They would chase her down, accelerating until they hit her - *if* she let them. One of the first things the Master had taught her was what he called "judo magic". (He was the *only* one who called it that.) It wasn't hard to disrupt judo magic - *if* you knew how, and *if* you knew it was coming. But if she took control of the tracker stars, like so... and made it seem as if they were still following her, like so... and then did an Immelmann roll to get behind him, like so... and then let them strike him in the back, like so--! Well, then, he'd promptly fall out of the air. Like so. -----------<>----------- HOLY CRAP THIS GUY'S TRYING TO KILL ME! ...thought Casey. (The writer of this scene is not *currently* evading a murderous rampage.) Dodging frantically, he tried to get a fix on the robo-Baron's surface thoughts, but it was like reading words in an illegible font from across the room. Okay, don't panic. You shouldn't panic, even though the personal force shield was reading repeated grazes, each of which drained the power supply. And the Baron was getting closer with each blast, boxing him in so that he could-- Wait... draining the power supply... Ohhhhh this was a *stupid* plan. But it was the only one he had, so he sucked it up. Step 1. Switch personal force shield from "deflect energy" to "absorb energy". Which seemed like a no-brainer, except that if the battery overcharged, Very Bad Things would happen. Step 2. Taunt the killer robot. Had he mentioned yet that this was a stupid plan? "Um, ha ha! Only the most focused and powerful of assaults can get through my impenetrable force field!" Step 3. Keep dodging, forcing the robo-Baron to waste many of his "focused and powerful" attacks on misses. Step 4. Switch between charging and draining the battery and HOPE TO GOD that doing so repeatedly doesn't break it or make it explode or something! And just keep doing that and doing that, forcing him to try bigger and bigger attacks, and hoping that he drained his energy supplies before-- With a crack and a hiss, black smoke escaped from the shield generator, and the force shield flickered away. The Baron grinned, holding a hand out menacingly and... causing a few tiny sparks to come out. He frowned, shaking his hand out and looking at his palm... until he realized he'd begun to fall out of the air... -----------<>----------- The Faded Iron Master summoned three balls of energy and juggled them in his hand, smirking. "You are aware that you're not going to win this, right? I've fought you before, and won." "Hah!" The Baron puffed out his chest in midair. "The one you fought in the Looniverse was nothing! Now you face my TRUE power, not that of some cheap copy!" "Hey!" "Blaggart!" "Mrmnpl!" "Shut up!" The FIM chuckled and shook his head. "No, no, I don't mean that single battle. I mean the dozens of battles you and I have fought, over the next thirty years, each sharpening our skills on the other, each gaining intimate knowledge of the other's flaws and weaknesses... You know, *those* battles." "...ah. Yes, of course. Those battles." "Yep." "..." BLAM! With desperate power, bursts of energy surged from the Baron's hands, but it was too late. The FIM slipped beneath the blasts and, one quick succession of blows later, the Baron was reeling... -----------<>----------- The Zinc Oxide Tyrant stood stock-still for a moment. In the wink of an eye, things had fallen apart. It was too much to handle... for any normal man, that is. But he was no normal ma-- Suddenly the woman was bearing down on him and his arm and his sword swept up to block and he stepped back and she swept the staff at his feet and he leapt up on the throne and their weapons met and they looked each other in the eyes. "Ah, one of my lesser pawns." He pushed back and they separated, the woman standing at guard. "Didn't expect you to figure it out." He spun his blade and grinned. "Suppose you needed an old man to tell you what was what." Carmine's face twisted... and she threw back her head and laughed. "No, sir! We are not doing that." She began spinning her staff. "Words, words, words. You slay men with words, but alas, there is no more room." With each spin, the weapons drew closer together. "We are here, we are taking you down, and there is no one left to listen. You LOSE! Good DAY, sir!" In a crackling cacophony, magic metal met magic metal. There was a wrenching, grinding explosion, and when it was over, the Tyrant was left holding the lower half of a sword. "...BAH!" He tossed it away. "Fine, then. No more words - it's time to take ACTION!" He snapped his fingers, and the crystal spheres atop his throne burst - revealing the Four Atavists! The other heroes (whose own fight scenes had ended by this point) turned and gasped. "The ceremony--" said the Faded Iron Master, flabbergasted. The Tyrant cackled. "Oh, the ceremony *will* take place, in due time! But a little *bird* told me you might try and pull something like this - so we rigged a sweet little backup plan, just for you!" Carmine leapt forward, but was blown back by a torrential gust of wind. She covered her face with her arm and looked into the heart of the storm. The Tyrant threw his head back and gave a great big belly laugh, hair blowing in the breeze like some kind of demented romance novel protagonist, pendant jingling on its chain. The Atavists spun around his head like a chintzy halo. A veil of shimmering light materialized around his body and began to expand outwards, pulsating with twisting prismatic hues. Carmine swore and reached into her bag. Only one option left, and she'd have to make it count... ~~~~~~~~~~~()~~~~~~~~~~~ The others had been satisfied with raiding the Legion's mass-produced supplies, but Carmine felt hers was still missing something. "In case our plan fails, t'would be prudent to have a backup - and I always feel safer with something that can sunder enchantment." "Oooh! Idea! Just a sec!" Actually, it was about half an hour, but Kid Enthusiastic came back with an ornate obsidian box. He opened it, and resting inside was a dagger - Occultism Kid's Blade of Mundane Winters, it seemed, an iron dagger with a hyper-refrigeration unit in the handle, able to make it cold enough to pierce any kind of magic. "But that's not the meaning of the phrase 'cold iron'," she said, bemused. "Oh, yeah," nodded Kid Enthusiastic, "but its hyperanentropic force twists the retcotheric field! And the lexographic serendipity enhances the spellbreaking effect!" "...well then." She tucked it safely away. "Seems that I am prepared..." ~~~~~~~~~~~()~~~~~~~~~~~ She pressed the silver button, and frost immediately formed on the metal. She leapt forward, her fingers going numb, and stabbed down. The blade pierced the glittering curtain, but the Tyrant dodged nimbly to the side. The dagger sliced forward, neatly severing the pendant on its chain... and a burst of light pierced their minds... <<<<<**************>>>>> China, long ago. A mage and a smith toil tirelessly, seeking to capture elemental force. Their efforts are rewarded, and they hold up a steaming circle of metal in the shape of an @. <<<<<**************>>>>> A hero faces up to an army. He touches the pendant, and is clad in crimson armor - but he falls, and the pendant is placed around the neck of his son. <<<<<**************>>>>> His son's son's son's son's son's son's son is a hero, facing an enemy in a snowy mountain pass; there is an explosion, and suddenly, he is in a new world, where a different war rages. <<<<<**************>>>>> The war is over. The hero has brought peace, and the factions have settled into Houses; he has become a lord. <<<<<**************>>>>> The pendant is passed down the generations once more. But year by year, it loses power, works less and less, is eventually put away and becomes forgotten. <<<<<**************>>>>> Generations later, a young man finds the pendant; when he touches it, the armor appears, and he becomes a hero. <<<<<**************>>>>> The power has faded once more, and the man, no longer young, hardly heroic, begins a desperate ritual to recharge it. But he is caught, and in penance, is exiled. He swears to return, not as a lord, but as a Tyrant... <<<<<**************>>>>> The light faded, revealing Carmine, covered in ornate crimson armor. Runes swirled over its surface, intricate sigils of punctuation. With a burst of energy, she leapt through the air, snagging the Atavist of Earth and breaking the mystic circle. The others clattered to the floor, and the Zinc Oxide Tyrant stood, mouth agape. "It... gave itself to you! Why? Why have you forsaken me!?" Carmine smirked. "Isn't it obvious? You don't have the proper... character." While he was still stunned by her pun, she whipped out a right hook and he fell to the ground. The rest of the team crowded around. "Interesting..." mused the Faded Iron Master. "Astounding!" said Kid Enthusiastic. "Neat," said Mala. "...wow," said Casey. Carmine let out a breath and examined herself. The armor flashed bright red and faded away, leaving glowing sigils on her body. "An opportune development. I believe I shall give it the reverence it deserves." And with that, she started leaping up and down, laughing gleefully. "Bwahahaha, YES! Got the bloody bastard! Oh!" She pounded her fist into her palm. "But that *does* feel good." The Faded Iron Master looked around, grinning. "It does, doesn't it... well!" He clapped his hands. "We had best take care of that war between the Periodic Houses and Erehton, shouldn't we?" "Ooooh, yeah, I forgot about that!" said Kid Enthusiastic. -----------<>----------- Two captured generals working for the Tyrant, a public revelation, a few displays of high-tech might and a few peace talks later... A great celebration wound its way through the streets. An enormous table had been set up with layers of smorgasbord on it. Weapons had been tossed down, and people danced between the buildings. From now on, today would be an annual holiday. The heroes of the day were seated at the end of the table. Crowds thronged around them, wanting autographs and handshakes. Kid Enthusiastic had set up a holoprojection unit, and fancies and dreams danced above their heads. The Faded Iron Master pushed back his plate, waving away offers of complex and sumptuous desserts. "Well. I'm always one for more adulation, but I think the time has come to move on." "Indeed, time for the final battle!" said Carmine, exultantly thrusting a fist into the air. "To eternity and beyond!" Kid Enthusiastic hopped up on his chair and posed. "Okay, sure!" Casey shrugged, fork full of savory seitan in the air. "Um..." Mala looked over at the FIM, who nodded. "Guys... you've done a *hell* of a lot already. But this is our--" "Nay!" interrupted Carmine. "We are sticking with you, through thick and thin! Say not that this is your fight, for what pains one of us pains all!" "Yeah!" shouted Kid Enthusiastic. "There's no way we're not seeing this through to the end!" "Okay, sure!" Casey cheered, finishing his dinner. Mala leaned over to the FIM and whispered. "So... why were we telling them we didn't need them? I was seriously sweating!" "Look at those happy people! Now they're all pumped up." -----------<>----------- They'd trekked outside the city to the sound of cheering crowds, to get outside the future radius of the Tyranny Zone. There were still two hours until the time portal would spring up as predetermined, so they spent that time talking about what the world of tomorrow was like; the technological bleed from the Looniverse, the burgeoning trade of interdimensional tourism, the cultural changes from years of strife... "But you haven't really told us much about you!" said Kid Enthusiastic. "Yeah, I was kind of avoiding that topic," muttered Casey. "Indeed, your personal life has remained closed off!" uttered Carmine. "Please, speak: Who has remained close to you through the years, beyond your young ward?" "...'ward'?" said Mala. "Well," said the Faded Iron Master, "if I had to pick the one closest to me, there's only one choice: my wife." "Ah, yes," Mala grinned, "the Lady!" "Lady? Wh--" Carmine's question was drowned out as, in a flash, the shimmering oval portal opened before them. Almost immediately, a figure stepped through. She was tall, and with a strong profile. Age had left its mark on her, but it did not hide her striking features. "Oh, there she is!" Mala hopped up and hugged the woman, who rubbed her on the head affectionately and smiled. "The Lady Aurum!" "The Lady... Aurum..." Carmine stared. "Your... wife!?" Casey swallowed. -----------<>----------- SD-Lady Aurum: "Next issue!" "It's going to be the future soon! But will advanced awkwardness hamper the battle against the second-stage boss form? And what tricks does a techno-Tyrant have up his cyber-sleeves?" "Next time on Digital JUMP! JASPER! Rime of the Ancient Mario Brother!" "Kiss the vampire ladybug..." -----------<>----------- Author's Note: Okay, we're in the home stretch! Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, full steam ahead! <----------------------> Drew "I didn't miss posting for several days, *you* missed posting for several days" Nilium