dbi:mysql mysql has gone away

I've been using Ruby/mod_ruby now for...about 5 months and truly like it 
- developing about 1/2 dozen sites for  a customer, utilizing the same 
common code for things like content and user mgt. Adding another site is 
quite simple. Its great and the customer is happy.

I'm using dbi: mysql ruby - and i use it a lot - say 6,8 or 10 
lookups(session mgt, site vars, etc) Of course I plan to cache these at 
some time. However, still, and for some time, i've intermittantly been 
getting this /'Mysql has gone away'/* *error - about 1 in 30 or 40 
pages. Gone away without so much as a post card! Upon refresh it is gone 
and generally, I can catch the error, only hobbling the page somewhat. 
I've checked mysql to see if I'm hanging connections - i'm not. In fact, 
code is set up in such a way that that would be difficult.

I'm not 'finishing' recordsets - i'm exclusively using select_one,or 
select_all (which does this automatically i understand) - and they are 
typically in closures anyhow.

The only non-typical thing i'm doing is sharing the code between sites - 
would this affect a threadding problem or something - do mod_ruby and 
dbi:ruby get along??

My host says 'mysql is not stable' - running 3.23. They suggest 
postegre. My needs are not sophisticated. My needs are more in terms of 
speed.

It has come to be a neat system - you should see the customers eyes when 
I create a whole new site by simply draggin a file into a directory!

http://suite.integrated-internet.com

I simply can not chase this down. Anyone suggest any paths to explore 
that might help find this?

Thanks,Paul