Re: Self-Righteousness, Sodomy and the Supreme Court (Was Re: Filter: Andreas Pour)

At 03:50 +0100 2/24/04, Rob Kaper wrote about Re: Self-Righteousness, 
Sodomy and the Supreme Court (Was R:

|On Mon, Feb 23, 2004 at 02:16:39PM -0500, Seth Rothberg wrote:
|> You can't know that, not having been raised by a single sex couple. Besides,
|> being raised by two moms or two dads may also, as you say be,  "an 
experience
|> that no child should live without"--just a different one than 
being raised by
|> a man and a women.
|
|Nonsense.
|
|It should go without saying that two same-sex parents would not be able to
|provide both a male and female perspective. While the experience would be
|equally unique, it would be one based on a subset of insights and
|viewpoints.
|
|Can a little girl *really* turn to her two daddies when she starts
|menstruating? Can a little boy *really* turn to his two mommies when he gets
|his first boner?


Having raised a child and have been one myself I think I can answer this one.

Tell me Rob, did you turn to your daddy when you had your first 
boner? Maybe you did, but I think most guys will turn to an older 
brother or friends first before 'talking' with their dads about this. 
Same goes for girls. Most girls will have discussed menstruation with 
their friends or sisters long before they go to their moms.

People who choose to be same sex parents are mostly well-prepared for 
this kind of stuff. I personally know same sex couple and really do 
think they make sometimes even better parents. They have thought 
everything through, they are prepared for every situation, they know 
what questions a child will have and how they can react to that. 
Unlike a lot of hetero parents who don't have a clue how to raise a 
child and are still hung up on their own sexuality. Not many parents 
can discuss menstruation or a boy's first sexual experience openly if 
they haven't been brought up like that.

The children of my friends, who are same sex parents, do funnily 
enough not see their parents as 2 dads or 2 moms. But really do see 
them as 2 parents, kind of sex-less. As most children do. Depending 
on what kind of relation  you're have with that parent you will turn 
to that parent with intimate questions. I have some male friends who 
can speak openly with their daughters about sex while their moms are 
not so comfortable with the subject. I also have a girlfriend who's 
son comes to her with all kinds of boy-questions, not going to his 
dad because he's an insensitive asshole.

What I'm trying to say is that roles in a marriage and as parents no 
longer are strict and well defined like they were in the '50s. Guys 
have become more sensitive and nourishing and women have become more 
family supporting. In most countries it's very normal men take 
maternity leave also. So society is changing and with that the roles 
within a family.


--
Tink

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