Re: Introductions / Emotions

Chris Morris wrote:

> > When I balance that
> > draining energy/emotion with a restorative emotion, it helps me find a
> > way to access the courage I need to move out of my own pit.
> 
> Can you give some examples of what 'balancing' with a restorative
emotion
> looks like? I'm of the belief that I have little to no control over my
> feelings, so that's the pond I'm fishing in :)

Well, the book I cited lists Jesus and the Buddha as exemplars of what
I referred to as the height of restorative emotions -- enlightenment.
 So the way I'm interpreting some of your comments in your thread
exchange with James is that you are working at balancing your draining
emotions (shame and guilt and judgement, for example, for having
violated beliefs) with the restorative emotions you seek in the Bible.
 In my read of the Bible, and I think I agree with James here, I
always noted the passage (in Exodus, I think) where Moses was looking
for God -- and found him in the still small voice.  I found my own
still small voice in the peace and bliss of quiet meditation and
contemplation (something espoused by many religious practices --
including many Christian religious practices).  

At another level, focusing on any positive/restorative emotion or
action towards that, can help gain emotional and cognitive distance
enough from the really draining emotions to work through what
information the emotion is trying to convey.  For example, someone
wants help with a 'problem'.  Focusing on the problem gives you more
problem.  Focusing on what you want -- a resolution (and this is a
technique behind Appreciative Inquiry and Brief Consulting both) --
can find a space wherein the 'problem' is moot -- or at least at
enough distance you can work with it.  Rather than trying not to sin,
focus on what brings redemption -- forgiveness, acceptance, and love.
 This was, in my read of the Gospels, what the message of those books
was all about.

For direct application to this thread, rather than focus on why
someone is resisting, find out what they want/need.  And help them
find that within the situation.  Honor the resistance, accept it as
how it is, right now, and focus on where they want to be.  

That's what I meant by balancing the draining emotions with
restorative ones.  

Yes, for some folks that are seriously 'stuck' this has its limits. 
But given the extensive body of practice and theory in cognitive
psychology around this, tells me that this is a really effective strategy.

Amy

Amy Schwab
True North pgs, Inc.
http://www.projectcommunity.com


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