Re: [needs proofread] DMA - Appple case page

"Richard L. Schmeidler" <[email protected]>
Newsgroups gmane.org.fsf.europe.translators
Message-ID <CAKbK2axsCamVSRTaHnuMZgHCuL-O2rVdd4R=ALfjo_w0ALF4tw@mail.gmail.com> 
I have proofread this news item using the webpreview to which you
referred.   I am attaching a version of the html that you attached
that reflects my suggestions for improvements.  (I am using your html
file for this purpose so as to avoid the possibility that the very
convenient webpreview may become a moving target.)

In particular (and I suspect that this may be a "moving-target"
matter) I have encountered a substantial discrepancy between the
webpreview and your attachment.  See my #9.   If you tell me which one
to follow (or send replacements for one or both of the webpreview and
your attachment), I shall proofread afresh.

1.  First image, alt text:  "Illustration of an apple with a worm in
its inside"  I suggest replacing "in its inside" with "inside it."
English usage.  [To the contrary, I must admit that there is a
well-known song in the comic opera "The Mikado" with the words ' "Is
it weakness of intellect, birdie?" I cried, "Or a rather tough worm in
your little inside?" ']

2.  "Its unbalanced power spans over key aspects of software and
devices, profoundly distorting digital markets."  I suggest removing
"over."  English usage.  The verb "to span" already contains the
concept of over-ness.

3.  "Apple’s dominance negatively affects not only competition among
other companies, but software freedom, open internet and ultimately
digital democracy."  You mention competition among other companies,
but not competition with other companies.  If this is what you want to
say, I have no objection, and I am not offering a suggestion for
improvement.  But if I were writing this I would either say
"competition with other companies" or "competition with and among
other companies."  You seem to be excluding the impact of Apple's
dominance on its own competition with other companies (such as
Microsoft).

4.  "The DMA imposes on such companies several obligations, like the
right to install and uninstall software in devices"  I suggest
inserting "allowing" after "like."  The rights to install and
uninstall are not themselves obligations of Apple; they belong to
Apple's users.

5.  "prohibitions to non-removable pre-installed software"

(a)  I suggest replacing "prohibitions" with "prohibition."  Of course
this suggestion should not be followed if there is more than one
prohibition.

(b)  Replace "to" with "of."  English usage.

6.  "In September 2023, the European Commission designated Apple as
“gatekeeper” under the DMA."  Insert "a" before "gatekeeper."

7.  "With that, the law began to apply on Apple’s operating system,
app store and browser."  Replace "on" with "to."  English usage.

8.  "However, Apple has taken an aggressive position against the DMA
starting litigation against the European Commission in November,
2023."

(a)  Insert a comma after "DMA."

(b)  Remove the comma after "November."  In the first sentence of this
paragraph (see my #6, above), and in the very next sentence, there is
no comma between the month and the year.  Aside from the issue of
correct usage, I find the inconsistency grating.

9.  On the webpreview, there is a quotation from Dr. Martin Husovec,
the lawyer representing FSFE in the court.  He is described in the
previous sentence in the text of the webpreview.  Both the text and
the quotation appear in the xhtml generated from the webpreview.
Neither the text nor the quotation appears in the the html file you
attached.

10.  "Dr. Martin Husovec, a lawyer with extensive experience in
strategic litigation for non-profit is representing the FSFE before
the court."  Replace "non-profit" with "non-profits."  "Non-profit"
(more commonly "nonprofit" in the US) is an adjective or a singular
noun; "non-profits" is the plural noun that is needed here.
(Obviously, I have not put this suggestion into my version of the html
file.)

11.  "we claim the case be dismissed completely"

(a)  Replace "claim" with "urge" (or something else).  In English
usage, "claims" are assertions of facts or rights.  This is a request
to the court, but I do not think that the FSFE has an established
right to this result, rather than urging it on the court as being
just.

(b)  I suggest inserting "that" before "be."

12.  "Here is how your rights are affected by this litigation:"  I
suggest rewriting as "Here is how your rights will be affected by this
litigation if the FSFE is successful:"  The various rights listed
would be adversely affected if Apple is successful!

13.  "Software developers will enjoy less restrictive barriers to
access and distribute their software in environments controlled by
Apple"  I suggest inserting "be able to" before "distribute."

14.  "Software developers will be able to demand from Apple rights
allowing the installation of third party apps (side-loading), the use
of third party app stores, the un-installation of pre-installed
software in devices;"

(a)  I suggest replacing "from Apple rights allowing the" with "that
Apple allow."  The right to install an app on their computers belongs
to Apple's users, not the developer of the app.

(b)  Replace the comma after "stores" with "and."  The consistent
usage in this news item is not to use Oxford commas (but not to string
together a list without saying "and.")

15.  "Software developers will be able to demand effective and
free-of-charge interoperability between their software with Apple’s
software and hardware controlled by Apple’s operating system."
Replace "with" with "and."  English usage.

16.  "Users will benefit from more competition and offers from
third-party providers, including alternative app-stores, features and
solutions."  Replace "app-stores" with "app stores."  This form is
used consistently in this document.

17.  Caption:  "Apple may have more billions of dollars than FSFE has
balloons. However, such concentrated power should not intimidate us to
defend Software Freedom!"  Replace "to defend" with "from defending."
English usage.

18.  While putting my suggestions into the html file I am attaching, I
see that at the top of the html file you attached there are a lot of
references to Youth Hacking 4 Freedom.  I am not fluent in html, and I
do not know what effects these will have, but I don't see them in the
xhtml generated by webpreview.  Of course, I am not making any
suggestions about these and other details of the html.


On Tue, Oct 22, 2024 at 5:30 AM Ana Galan <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> Dear all,
>
> we want to publish next week the following page:
>
> https://webpreview.fsfe.org/cgi/fsfe.pl?pad=1289
>
> it would be great if it can be proofread. It will be also a good to have
> it translated so this case will take a lot of time and it would be good
> to have this information in several other EU languages.
>
> Best,
>
> Ana
> _______________________________________________
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> To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected]
>
> This mailing list is covered by the FSFE's Code of Conduct. All
> participants are kindly asked to be excellent to each other:
> https://fsfe.org/about/codeofconduct



-- 
"The problem with quotes on the internet is that it is difficult to
determine whether or not they are genuine." -- Abraham Lincoln

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<main><div id="content">

  <h1>The FSFE is intervening for Free Software in a key court case involving Apple and the European Commission. Apple is trying to avoid obligations derived from the Digital Markets Act (DMA). The FSFE seeks to hold Apple accountable under the DMA in a developer-friendly way.</h1>

  <div id="introduction">
    <p>
      <strong>The FSFE is intervening for Free Software in a key court case involving Apple and the European Commission. Apple is trying to avoid obligations derived from the Digital Markets Act (DMA). The FSFE seeks to hold Apple accountable under the DMA in a developer-friendly way.</strong>
    </p>
  </div>

  <figure class="fullwidth no-border">
    <img src="https://pics.fsfe.org/uploads/medium/12/97/ab4667655231f8b2ebc20f83c3e0.png" alt="Illustration of an apple with a worm inside it"     >
  </figure>
  <p class="license">
    Graphic by Rahak, <a href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/">CC-BY-SA 4.0</a> or later
  </p>

  <h3>Apple’s unbalanced power is a threat to Free Software</h3>

  <p>Apple is one of the largest tech companies in the world. Its 
  unbalanced power spans key aspects of software and devices, 
  profoundly distorting digital markets. Apple’s dominance negatively 
  affects not only competition among other companies, but software 
  freedom, open internet and ultimately digital democracy.</p> 

  <p>The Digital Markets Act (DMA) is the European Union’s regulatory 
  response to such corporate power. The law applies to very large 
  companies exercising “gatekeeper control” in the EU. The DMA imposes 
  on such companies several obligations, like allowing the right to install and 
  uninstall software in devices, prohibition of non-removable 
  pre-installed software, enabling third-party app stores and access 
  rights via interoperability with software and hardware functions.</p>

  <p>In September 2023, the European Commission designated Apple as a 
  “gatekeeper” under the DMA. With that, the law began to apply to 
  Apple’s operating system, app store and browser. However, Apple has 
  taken an aggressive position against the DMA, starting litigation 
  against the European Commission in November 2023.</p>

  <p>>Due to the high risks against Software Freedom involved in this 
  case, in February 2024, the FSFE decided to intervene to hold Apple 
  accountable under the DMA in a developer-friendly way.</p>
 
<figure>
<img src="https://pics.fsfe.org/uploads/big/d0988bf4e317a6cd7953689adf50b573.jpg">
<alt="" />
<figcaption>Barriers against software freedom and vendor lock-in are constant hurdles faced by developers and users interacting with Apple</figcaption>
</figure>
 
  <h3>Safeguarding the interests of Free Software developers and users</h3>

  <p>Apple, in this case (T-1080/23), is trying to dodge the DMA rules over its app store and interoperability of its operating system. The company’s narrow interpretation of the DMA frames these obligations as disproportionate in relation to its commercial and economic interests.</p> 
  
  <p>The FSFE is countering this position by proving that Apple is being regulated in the light of public interest. We assert that Apple should compete on trustworthiness. Developers and users should benefit from alternative services and products, not just those offered by Apple. For reasons of fair competition, cybersecurity and consumer protection we urge that the case be dismissed completely. </p>

  <p>Here is how your rights will affected by this litigation if the FSFE is successful:</p>

<div>
 <p><strong>As a developer:</strong></p>
  <ul>
  <li><strong>Access rights:</strong> Software developers will enjoy less restrictive barriers to access and be able to distribute their software in enviroments controlled by Apple;</li>
  <li><strong>More software freedom:</strong> Software developers will be able to demand that Apple allow installation of third party apps (sideloading), the use of third party app stores and the uninstallation of pre-installed software in devices;</li>
  <li><strong>Better interoperability policies:</strong>Software developers will be able to demand effective and free-of-charge interoperability between their software and Apple’s software and hardware controlled by Apple’s operating system.</li>
  </ul>
 </div> 
 
 <div>
 <p><strong>As a user:</strong></p>
  <ul>
  <li><strong>Enhanced freedom of choice:</strong>Users will enjoy more freedom of choice regarding software on Apple devices. Users will benefit from more competition and offers from third-party providers, including alternative app stores, features and solutions.</li>
  </ul>
 </div> 
 
 <p><a href="https://download.fsfe.org/device-neutrality/fsfe-Intervention-apple-vs-commission-Sep-24-redacted.pdf">Read our court submission</a></p>
 

 <h3>Help us win this legal struggle for Software Freedom!</h3>

<figure>
<img src="https://pics.fsfe.org/uploads/original/cf/c6/6c33f97f53318757690ee3e4936e.webp">
<alt="" />
<figcaption>Apple may have more billions of dollars than FSFE has balloons. However, such concentrated power should not intimidate us from defending Software Freedom!       </figcaption>
</figure>

<div>
<blockquote>This case is a pivotal moment in the struggle for Software Freedom. Apple has billions of dollars to hinder proper implementation of the DMA. We say no to restricting the rights and freedoms of Free Software developers and users! We are the only civil society organisation taking action in this case. Our victory depends on your financial support. We face this risky challenge with courage and determination. Donate to our cause today!</blockquote>
</div>


<h3>Timeline of the case</h3>
<ul>
<li><strong>September 2023</strong> - Apple is designated by the European Commission as a gatekeeper under the DMA</li>
<li><strong>November 2023</strong> - Apple appeals the designation decision to the Court of Justice of the European Union (CJEU).</li>
<li><strong>February 2024</strong> - The FSFE requests to intervene.</li>
<li><strong>August 2024</strong> - The CJEU allows the FSFE to intervene in the case.</li>
<li><strong>September 2024</strong> -  The FSFE submits its arguments to the CJEU.</li>
</ul>
	
<h3>Related news</h3>	

<related-feed tag="DMA"/>


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