Re: [UG-ADMINS] Dealing with a member issue

Hey Beth,

Sorry to hear you are having troubles with an individual at both the
conference and your user group meetings now.  Though we have not gone
through this ourselves a few thoughts. Make sure to keep a record of every
incident incase it escalates.  Make sure to have a written letter stating
that the person is not welcome to discuss such items at your user group
meetings, message board mailing list, or conferences.  In case it goes
further than what some would like, restraining order if required, you will
need that paper trail to show you have respectfully asked them to stop.

I would also agree with others already, start with a warning (which you
have done but was it in written form?). If it continues go with a temporary
ban, can call it a cooling off period.  Once the person has been brought
back to the group and they continue I would agree that a full ban from user
group activities and conferences would be necessary. If they still continue
I would consider going one step further.

Each situation is different so ultimately it will be your decision on how
you want to handle it.

 - Jon

On Wed, Jan 20, 2016 at 2:59 PM Tessa Mero <[email protected]> wrote:

> Beth, to add to my previous message, now that I just read David's message,
> do you have a very basic Code of Conduct for your user group? If not, I'm
> happy to give you a copy of our SeaPHP's code of conduct. You may use the
> whole thing (open source!) and it's very short and precise, basically
> stating to be respectful to people, not harass people, not threaten people,
> or you will be removed from the user group. That way you have something to
> point them to, as a reasoning for their removal, rather than the "rules
> coming out of your mouth".
>
>
>
> On Wed, Jan 20, 2016 at 12:56 PM, Tessa Mero <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> > Hi Beth,
> >
> > The Seattle PHP User Group is dealing with an IDENTICAL issue. The person
> > has personality issues and a bit on functional psychotic side. He doesn't
> > corner people, but harasses people non stop about his fictional life
> > stories. Most of these stories are absurd and ridiculous, sometimes
> > disgusting. He has made numerous people uncomfortable and people are
> afraid
> > to be at a meetup near him. I've had people contact me in private fearing
> > his actions. (Such as, a group member has the same exact first name as a
> > famous person that the harasser does not like, and talks to him as if he
> is
> > that famous person and sends horrible letters to him frequently).
> >
> > So, as first steps, our organizers had a recent vote to remove the said
> > harasser from our mailing lists, so he now cannot receive email
> > notifications from our mailing list.  Since that sends a notification of
> > the removal, he sent a very disgusting message to us that made absolutely
> > no sense, but using disgusting words.
> >
> > I think the next steps would be removal from the meetup group, and if
> > harassment continues to group members, we may put a restraining order on
> > him.
> >
> > Your situation is the same, but a bit different with what's coming out of
> > the persons mouth. In this case, when you are repeatedly asking someone
> to
> > please stop something, and they continue, I'd assume it would be
> > harassment, and harassment should be leading to a ban.
> >
> > I'm open ears to hear other peoples suggestions as well. Thank you for
> > sharing Beth. This may open up others to share stories too, so we can all
> > give feedback to each other.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > Tessa Mero
> > SeaPHP Organizer
> >
> > On Wed, Jan 20, 2016 at 12:31 PM, Beth Tucker Long <
> > [email protected]> wrote:
> >
> >> We have a member who just started coming to our conference and user
> group
> >> meetings. At the conference, he consistently cornered people to talk to
> >> them about Jesus. He has started doing it at the meetings too. We have
> >> asked him to stop and explained that this is not an appropriate venue
> for
> >> these discussions and that the discussions need to stay PHP-focused. He
> has
> >> replied that he cannot stop talking about Jesus, and that if we want
> him to
> >> stop, we'll have to kick him out of the group. We responded with a firm
> >> response clarifying that our group is not the appropriate venue for his
> >> preaching and that discussions must stay on topic. We did not say he was
> >> banned from the group. He has not taken the hint and has now tried
> >> contacting the group leadership through the conference website (he
> >> apparently doesn't realize that we are the same people) asking for a
> >> face-to-face meeting to discuss these issues.
> >>
> >> Has anyone dealt with anything like this in their group? We do not want
> >> this to get ugly as we are a small group and this person has not caused
> >> issues in the past, so this is a new thing that started recently (in
> >> November). Any advice?
> >> Thanks,
> >> Beth
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> --
> >> Beth Tucker Long
> >> Treeline Design, LLC
> >> 807 Arbor Vitae Place
> >> Verona, WI 53593
> >> 608-770-6677
> >> http://www.TreelineDesign.com
> >>
> >>
> >> --
> >> Usergroup Coordination Mailing List (http://ug.php.net)
> >> To unsubscribe, visit: http://www.php.net/unsub.php
> >>
> >>
> >
>