Re: Internal resistance

Hi Laurent,

 > Is the topic of "internal resistance" also of interest ?

I'm interested.  It was by exploring that very question that I 
developed my ideas about the "elements of motivation." 
Motivation is a combination of:
    - Expectations about ability (Can I do it?)
    - Expectations about results (If I try to do it, what will be
      the results?)
    - Values (Do I want those results?)

(See my "Resistance as a Resource" article, especially the 
section titled "The First Factor: Expectations" section.  If I 
were writing that section today, I'd call it "Motivations.")

 > One example of what I mean by "internal resistance" is
 > resisting something we've decided we should be doing. We don't
 > do it - "something" seems to be in the way.
 >
 > I've observed two instances in myself lately - I know I should
 > be picking up the phone and making "cold calls" to market my
 > consulting services, a lot more than I do.  But still I keep
 > finding reasons not to, or other things that come up.

I would say that /part/ of you knows you should -- the conscious 
part.  I believe you have thoughts and beliefs and intentions in 
addition to the ones you are aware of.  There are other parts of 
you that want something else, something that these parts believe 
is not compatible with making those phone calls.  You don't know 
so much (yet) about those unconscious parts.  You don't know 
what's motivating them: what they want, what results they expect, 
their beliefs about what you are able to do.

When the "resistance" is coming from other people, I recommend 
curiosity and empathy.  I recommend the same thing when the 
resistance is internal: curiosity and empathy for those 
unconscious internal parts and their motivations for you.

How would you express curiosity and empathy about someone else's 
motivations?  What happens when you apply those ideas to your own 
internal resistance?

 > In another instance, I've been hearing about "mind maps" from
 > friends, and said I'd probably try them, but I keep resisting
 > the simple exercise of picking up pen and paper to try them
 > out.

Instead of /you/ making a mind map, ask your "internal wisdom" to 
make one -- either about your resistance to making cold calls, or 
about your resistance to trying mind mapping.

Another possibility for understanding your resistance:  Sentence 
completion.  On the top of a piece of paper, write, "One reason I 
don't make cold calls is ______"  Then, as fast as you can, write 
a dozen or more different endings to that sentence.

I have more ideas about how to explore internal resistance.  I'll 
leave you with those for now.

Dale

-- 
Dale Emery -- Consultant -- Resistance as a Resource
Web:    http://www.dhemery.com
Weblog: http://www.dhemery.com/journal (Conversations with Dale)



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